The first gay shidduch I made has broken up, so I called up my friend the other day demanding my shadchanus gelt and my friend’s response was “what are you a pimp or something?” Which got me thinking about all…
Tag: shadchan
Shidduch Resume: 5ft 4, 110lbs, 34:24:35
I haven’t posted quite so many shidduch resumes on this site, because most people have only started to think beyond the pale of shidduch websites, asking their friends and facebook stalking. Most of the shidduch resumes I have posted are…
How do you go about rejecting a shidduch based on looks?
Hey Heshy, A friend and I had a discussion a few weeks ago about dating, weight, saying no and how to do so. We debated specifically about physical attributes and if a guy would tell a girl that her weight…
The guide to getting busy in the shidduch world
by Anshel M. Busy. “Officially busy”. Meaning too busy to date anyone but a certain someone else. Meaning the death knell to singlehood, whether it be his, hers or yours (IY”H by you, of course). Beginner’s Busy: One bochur I…
This is most insane shidduch resume ever
This was sent to me a while ago, it’s from frumster and as a word doc it was 40 pages long – I have no idea how they allowed something like this on Frumster, I hope it’s joke because it’s…
A girls guide to shadchan speak
A Girl’s Guide to Shadchan-Speak by Chaya Miriam Jurado Why should guys have all the fun? The following may or may not help you with your search. *He’s a bookkeeper = he can’t even change the windshield wipers on his…
Fine you’re a matchmaker!
Fine, You’re a Matchmaker by Anshel M. My. G-d. What have I gotten myself into? Nervous as you can possibly imagine, I called this shadchan (“she is NOT a shadchan”) on the insistence of my friend’s mother (“Oh please, don’t…
How do I tell a shadchan I want a girl with a huge rack?
This may be one of the funniest shidduch advice questions I have ever received, I find it even funnier because the guy sending it is on the yeshivish side and has probably not had much experience with his subject other…
Are you makpid on looks?
Typically the term Makpid is used in conversations about eating pas yisroel or checking your potato skins for bugs, but those folks who read the yeshiva world news forums are quite frummy and when you’re a real frummy you can…
I made my first gay shidduch
I don’t have that many frum gay friends, I count them all on one hand, so when I thought of the current shidduch I wasn’t working with much. I had mentioned it to both of the people involved some time…
Saw You At Sinai Sucks
Saw You At Sinai has accomplished a few things for me at once, it has made me feel that much better about leaving the east coast, taught me that I’m that much cooler than most of the frum folks out…
Shidduch rejection stories from the front lines
We’ve all heard about shidduch being broken due to non-white table cloth usage on shabbos, the boys having no laces in their shoes (says they are lazy) and the girl going to the wrong seminary, but those tales are old…
Who wants to marry a Maccabeat?
Truth be told, I didn’t post the Macabeats viral video (I was sent it way before it went viral) because I thought it was really gay (yes I know that term is offensive to the gay readers – too bad…
Girls are so much easier than guys!
To set up that is, I’m constantly thinking about people I can set up and I have come to the conclusion that girls are so much easier to set up than guys. In fact, while checking my hot bod out…
So what’s the deal with stacking or scraping?
Do you stack or scrape? I know it sounds weird, but apparently this is one of those random questions that frummies in the shidduch world ask. I have never been asked if I care about this particular way in which…
The best and funniest video describing Shadchanim
I have been saying the same thing for years, I just don’t know how to make videos – this is the best video describing the shidduch process via shadchan ever!!!
Frum Nudist wonders how to broach this issue on shidduchim
I received this comical, yet very interesting question the other day via email and I thought to share it with you. There are many practices which people wonder how to broach when it comes to shidduchim, I recently met someone…
Off the derech and looking for a shidduch
I have a lot of friends who are culturally orthodox, but aren’t necessarily religious and I’ve got to thinking about how to set these folks up. Lots of the folks I know simply don’t follow the path they grew up…
A tribute to shadchanim
Another 4 year old post: In response to all the angry mail I had gotten when I originally posted my rant bashing shadchanim on Craigslist, I wrote them a tribute, this was the second post ever put up on Frum…
The first post ever on Frum Satire: I love talking to shadchanim
This was the first post ever on Frum Satire. It reeks of immaturity, it reeks of arrogance, ignorance and judgmentalism (sic), but it’s such a long and fun post. I am posting it today because the actually anniversary is tomorrow,…
Making a shidduch rocks
Making a shidduch a tough job, but someone’s got to do it… I made my first successful shidduch recently. If you count the couple that met in the comments section of this blog and got married, I made two shidduchim,…
Shidduch phone call – you’re 6 feet tall right
I got a phone call today from a random 718 number, being that I rarely get any phone calls anymore since I moved west I picked it up and on the other end of the line I heard what I…
Shidduch Crisis Anonymous
Shidduch Crisis Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from the Shidduch Crisis. The only requirement for…
You might be part of the shidduch crisis if
Someone wants to pay you to go out with older girls. Girls are willing to fly to you so they can date you. You volunteer for chesed projects just to meet girls. You had a professional editor look at your…
Ambiguous terms used to describe a potential shidduch
I am sure I will miss a few terms, but there are some general terms that I hear quite often in the shidduch world. I just got back into the whole mix of things so I am sure I will…