When I was in Telz yeshiva there was a story told about Rabbi Eizik Ausband. It was said that as a young man in Telshe, Lithuania, he had thrown a moiser into river and drowned him. One brash bochur asked…
Author: Shragi
Some of Heshy’s Thoughts on the Catskills
I want to talk about the Catskills, I want to tell you how terrible the kosher food is here and how restaurant owner, employees and patrons all stare at you if you’re not wearing a yarmulke, I want to tell…
OTD Shabbos
I love the feeling of getting a Facebook notification that says “Yankel Shmerel has added you to the group…..”, it’s such an awesome feeling. There’s a new group in the Facebookisphere, a group devoted to solving one specific problem, everyone…
BREAKING! Aish Hatorah Sues LGBT Stabber
Guest post by Dov F JERUSALEM—Aish Hatorah, the world’s leading kiruv organization, is suing the gay pride stabber and the settler arsonists, sources say. A spokesman for the organization explained, “Many of our seminars that took time and money to…
Moral Advice to Mother of Gay Son
The following question appeared on the 5 Towns Jewish Times Dating Forum: My husband and I are having a big debate: Is there something wrong with forcing a child to get married? We have a son who is 26 years…
How a Torah Yid Deals With Rabbi Bodenheimer’s Guilty Plea
Today Rabbi Gavriel Bodenheimer, the principal of Bais Mikroh in Monsey, plead guilty to endangering the welfare of a child. He entered this plea because he was accused of molesting a boy, a student in the school. Torah Jews know that…
This Is Not a Love Story – A Review
Readers of Hush know that Judy Brown can make you cry, take you by surprise and make you dry your eyes at the same time*. They’ll be looking forward to the same experience when they buy her new book, This Is…
A Letter from a Father to his OTD Daughter
Ed: this letter is shared with permission from the father and daughter. My dearest Suri, As I fasted today, I sat and reflected on what our fast is all about. Why was our beautiful home in Yerushalayim destroyed? Why did…
Laying Blame for a Suicide
This isn’t very well known but the first suicide is recorded in the Torah. Nadav and Avihu had been depressed for a long time but things seemed to get worse during the construction of the mishkan. There are conflicting reports…
Footsteps’ Underhanded Kiruv Tactics Revealed
“Excuse me, are you Jewish?” “Yes” “Have you eaten any bacon yet today?” This exchange will become the norm in yeshiva and seminary campuses and on street corners in Borough Park, Lakewood, Williamsburg, Monsey and even New Square if we…
Changing the Immutable – A Review
Orthodox Judaism’s Tortured Relationship with Facts Look, we’re not children anymore, let’s not pretend that Orthodoxy’s mesorah which goes back to Moshe Rabbainu is any less crooked than the Tail of the Dragon and let’s not pretend it doesn’t have…
Matisyahu Salomon Desslers Himself
Rabbonim and askonim need to create fights in divorces, in fact I’d argue that they need to create divorces. A top rov in a small community once told me that the $300 fee he collects from gittin helps augment his…
All Zwiebel Wants is to Discriminate
This week’s Mishpacha Magazine prominently featured the new toy’ayvah laws. There was the usual hand wringing, which is to be expected, but then there was a two page feature of an interview with David Zwiebel, president of Agudath Israel, whose…
Only Simchas is Back!
Back in 2005 a friend of mine called me and told me the good news, he was engaged! “OMG!” I screamed, “I can’t fxxxing believe it! You’re fxxxing kidding me!” But he wasn’t kidding; he really was engaged and had…
Gay Marriage is Here, the Shidduch Crisis is Over
We are in a different country than we were in a week ago. Obamacare is now Scotuscare, North Carolina doesn’t fly the Confederate flag on their state house anymore and Walmart and Amazon aren’t selling anything bearing that flag anymore…
How to Piss Off all Your OTD Liberal Friends
So I’m seeing all these posts on Facebook from my OTD/Liberal friends saying they took this new Buzzfeed-style tests and they seemed to be very proud of their scores and the trophy they won. The whole thing is very odd…
Lining Up The Night Before Opening
This: is all it takes to get to get this: See here for more. And here for some anti-Semitism. And finally see the Yeshiva World News’ coverage of this awesome story here:
These Are the Worries Which Have No Limit
The kids, the teachers, the principal, the friends, the tuition committee, getting the kids into camp, getting the kids into high school, getting the kids a good shidduch,
Frum Satire Conference 2015
Frum Satire is in crisis. Eleven months ago I wrote a post called The Fable of the Rabbi Who Finally Made It and I immediately got an email from Heshy asking me to take it down. A rabbi from Cleveland recognized that…
Why People Go OTD
With the recent release of the mega-hit of the OTD world – Shulem Deen’s memoir “All Who Go Do Not Return“, the age-old question has come up again: why do people go OTD? Our rebbeim tell us, and we are…
Chizzuk from Gdi Oish
Erev Pesach is not a time for satire or jokes. We can spend all year debating whether the ancient Hebrews really built the pyramids or whether they were in Egypt altogether; but on Erev Pesach we put all that aside…
All Who Go Do Not Return – A Review
Readers of Frum Satire are obviously connoisseurs of fine Jewish reading material, and we don’t serve you many book reviews because we know we can hardly make any worthwhile suggestions that will pass your discriminating criteria. But once in awhile…
On The Orthodox Sex Guru
The New York Times Magazine just published a story about Bat Sheva Marcus, a Modern Orthodox sex counselor whose practice has become a go-to address for young hasidic women who suffer from not being interested in having sex with their…
Sexy Menorah Needs a Home
This incredible menorah was commissioned for the Chelsea Market for Christmas and Hanukka and was designed with Hanky Panky Underwear and with their donated scraps of lace. The maker of this sexy menorah is looking to sell it, and barring that, a…
Heshy Takes to NPR to Make Chillul Hashem
From The Technicality Show where Heshy recently appeared: On today’s show, it’s all about the technicalities, the loopholes, artful dodges and escapes. From how to get away with murder, to how to turn the lights off when your religion prohibits…