Unconsummated Marriage

I found this woman’s blog a few weeks ago and it makes me feel pretty sad, but I understand her need to let people know they aren’t alone in the issue and her need to talk about her hurt and pain.

Dear Rabbis, professionals, journalists, bloggers and anyone I thought could help,

My name is Sad Jewish Girl (SJG). I’m writing to let you know about a problem in our community you might not be familiar with, that of unconsummated marriage. This is a direct effect of the poor sexual education that women often receive throughout high school, college and kallah classes. I am writing a blog about my experience so that people who are not familiar can learn about this and so that those who are familiar can realize that someone else is in their situation and can hopefully gain chizuk from it. I am doing this because no one else in the frum community that I know of has done anything to publicly help, talk about or support people in my situation, even though Baruch Hashem there are therapists who exist and can help.

In case you think this is uncommon, you are wrong. It is very common in religious communities (not just Jewish also Mormon, Christian). To find out more about it you can contact Talli Rosenbaum who has treated hundreds of religious/ Jewish couples for it by emailing her at talli@tallirosenbaum.com.

The blog link is: http://unconsummated.blogspot.com. To read it through from beginning to current you can start from the last post here and scroll up: http://unconsummated.blogspot.com/2011_05_01_archive.html

Be warned, the blog contains strong emotions and sometimes very detailed descriptions because I am after all dealing with the topic of sexuality.

Please take a moment to think about this topic, consider sending this email on, doing an article on it or posting it up on your blog (or linking it on your blogroll) or talking about it with your students or in your communities.  You can literally save someone’s marriage. Maybe even their (emotional) lives (at the very least).

Thank you,