Purim aint what it used to be

I have heard warnings from multiple people never to have sex while on E (ecstasy) because you will never enjoy sex again, I think purim is the same way, ever since leaving yeshiva – Purim hasn’t been the same. For me the quintessential purim experience is the yeshiva kind. Going collecting and than a bunch of drunken purim shpiels while the sober wives watch their husbands make fools of themselves, have little homoerotic experiences with their chavrusas and collapse into a pile of puke laughing about something only they can understand.

Of course, I may be being negative because I have to work on Purim, why my fully kosher restaurant is open for a regular Sunday service on Purim is beyond me – I warned the chef not to be, but alas, I will pour a glass of wine, eat some bread and have my own little solo seuda at work. Luckily, the Jews of the Bay Area have the real parties on Purim night, which happens to be Saturday night this year – the only night I am off. So I will go check out some of the parties in San Francisco and get my purim on.

It just so happens to be that I never really appreciated purim, I think the fact that drunkenness bodes no appreciation in my book may have to do with it. I also think is best shared with good old friends, the kind who don’t mind if you puke in their cars or try to kill them during a drunken rage – we should keep in mind that I only drink wine and beer – I like the taste and not the alcoholic effects. Back in the day when I wanted to get some action, I would get a little tipsy, but in my old age confidence and no want for anything other than long term relationships that lead to marriage has led me away from drunken flirtations.

I should mention that I used to enjoy going to my cousins in Monsey for purim. Yeshivish folks really do purim right, they have a meal and in the middle of it, streams of drunken underage yeshiva boys come in and dance for money – kind of like the yeshivish version of the strip club if you will. Alas, I am nowhere near Monsey, I would go to one of the kollel guys here for the meal if I wasn’t to be working that day and it’s not like I can find someone else to take my shift on Purim.

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