I will survive circumcision: Did you have bris late in life?

from ken krimsteins book Kvetch as Kvetch CanI remember hearing these stories in yeshiva about kids who found out they weren’t really Jewish later on in life, the stories centered around whether or not the kid or young adult decided to stay the course and convert or leave the path and get laid – the stories never focused on the pain and anticipation of having your foreskin cut off while you knew exactly what was happening.

I’ll be honest, I wasn’t really sure what a foreskin looked like until several years ago when someone pointed one out to me and I’m kind of happy mine is gone, the whole foreskin thing seem like such a pain. It seems like having a foreskin (I never had one so I’m not truly sure) requires a lot of rolling up and down, kind of like a penile umbrella of sorts and what about the extra skin getting caught in your fly, that’s gotta blow. I have heard that it’s more pleasuarble, but I’m happy with not having to unroll my penis in order to take a piss thank you very much.

If I found out I wasn’t Jewish and had my foreskin intact I would be in a pretty precarious situation, wouldn’t it feel like someone was stretching your ding dong? What if you were so used to rolling and unrolling your hood that you tore it off or something? What would your wife think? Either way, I have a couple of friends who went through the operation and we never really spoke of it and quite frankly I don’t want to know the exact details I’m just curious if having your foreskin taken away from you make you feel closer to God? Or was that God’s plan, like taking away Abrahams son, the foreskin may be so precious to some folks that giving it up is way better than anything else when it comes to declaring your faith in the Lord.

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