Speed dating for kohanim

Just got a facebook spam message for a speed dating event for kohanim and eligible women. Here are some sample dates.

Date 1

Girl: Hi, I just wanted to tell you that I’m one of the few BT’s who has been certified kohen eligible by the star-K.

Kohen: How can you be a BT if you’re kohen eligible? It’s impossible, everyone knows that, especially if you went to public school.

Girl: I take offense to that, just because I wasn’t always frum doesn’t mean I had sex with non-Jews.

Kohen: Wait a second, the promoters told me that everyone here was not a zona.

Date 2

Kohan: Are you a virgin?

Girl: Isn’t that a bit untznius?

Kohen: This entire event is untznius, I bet you there are non-kohen’s here just looking for fresh goods, many frum guys don;t want sloppy seconds and having a publicly defined kohen eligible event implies that all girls in attendance are clean and have never touched another man.

Girl: I thought the law stated that you couldn’t sleep with a non-Jew, the biblical commandment states nothing about shomer negiah.

Kohen: NEXT!

Date 3

Kohen: How are you?

Girl: Good, but I don’t talk to boys.

Kohen: Wanna get married?

Girl: Nods yes!