What is proper mikvah etiquette?

I have to admit I am not much a fan of mikvah, just the thought of getting into a pool where a bunch of naked men are turns me off. The thought of these naked men not showering before is another turn off and just the thought of naked chassidish men scares the bejeebers out of me. My mikvah times are usually when I go skinny dipping on a hike or something.

what is proper mikvah etiquette is?

Do people pass soap to each other?

Is the soap on a rope?

Do people say shalom alechim to each other when they are in the pool?

Do people just hang out in the pool? Or do they dunk and leave? I always imagine that its a party in there and everyone is hanging out naked eating herring and talking about the latest community hock.

Do people make comments like – Yankel your shlong is huge, or hey nice job on the circumcision, where’d you get that done (to a convert) obviously.

Do mikvah goers whip each other with towels?

I am sure there are more but I think I am getting over my head already, and I didn’t even get into the mikvah.