Annoying things that happen on shabbos

Now that I am looking at this post, it seems a bit negative, but maybe we can look forward to some change. As the Obama campaign liked to point out “Yes we can” I have no idea what “we can” actually means. But maybe some people can relate to the items listed below and force some kind of change upon the frum community.

Things that happen on shabbos that bother me:

You sit down after washing only to realize that half the table is seated quietly and the other half is talking about how they picked out their cabinets and matching refrigerator, every time this happens I immediately think lower of the people I am eating at.

The host cuts challah that refuses to be cut and hacks away at it while everyone is wondering why he cannot just rip the damned thing, I am sure the BT’s are wondering if ripping food is ok on shabbos.

What is the deal with having the benchers open for 20 minutes before someone decides to say sheer hamolos? Mayim achronim has been passed around and we are all ready to go- until someone decides to start a whole new conversation which could be started after benching.

I have written about it before, but do I have to suffer through the fish and salad courses without anything to drink besides Moscato Diasti, might as well put soda on the table, it has the same alcohol content.

I guess I have been conditioned, but I really hate it when the chazzan doesn’t change the tune to lecha dodi in the middle by lo sevoshy. I feel like laziness ruins the whole song, just simply change the tune- and not to that really boring one that makes all the guests who are interested in Judaism wonder if the religion is right for them, based on the dying cow end of lecha dodi tune that all shuls love.

What’s the deal with having to wait for the Rabbi to make Kiddush?

Going to Kiddush and realizing that they have a women’s and men’s section with different food.

Going to a great Kiddush and having to leave early because your host is leaving

Having the chazzan try to do one of those half assed carlebachian kabalas shabbos versions they like to do for kiruv purposes and messing up all the tunes.

I love dancing in circles around the bimah when the people dancing are lively, but when its one of those forced shuffles which tend to happen in black hat shuls that have shabbatonim it is horrible, the dance is always drab and the singing is always drab and I would rather be reading the chumash then shuffling around with sweaty hand rubbing my back and another one in front of me wondering why my hand isn’t gripping his.

People who forget the salt during homotzy and then signal to their wife who is trying to figure out what on earth her husband who probably does this every week is talking about. There seriously has to be some sort of universal sign language for frummies (another posts in itself) Then of course by the time the salt is brought they realize that the knife is nowhere to be found.
People who pre-plate meals on shabbos really annoy me- what I need portion control, although it’s great if you are running out of food.

Brown food, I just hate it when people have nothing besides brown food on shabbos, oh and potato kugel is not counted as colorful.

Shul tissues that really aren’t tissues, you know those poor excuses for bathroom tissues that shuls have in those old rusty dispensers, what is the deal with that?

Breastfeeding in the Rabbis office- I thought that’s why the women’s bathrooms in shul always looked so nice and had chairs in them?

Kiddush bouncers- I always hated when I did a covert mission to check out if there would kishke and being blocked by some punk hired by the caterer to keep all people out. Nowadays with shul budget cuts it seems like old ladies who cal themselves the sisterhood in many places have taken over that job.

Shuls without English seforim- what else am supposed to do during a boring rabbis speech, at least have some stone chumashim or something.

Getting to shul late and realizing that they started late because they had no minyan, I mean the whole point of sleeping late on shabbos is so you don’t have to sit through that ridiculously long pesukei d’zimra that you skip anyway- come on do you actually say all those hodu’s?

Shuls that only have diet soda at the Kiddush, I have noticed that in south Dallas they only have diet soda and it just bothers me. Do people think that drinking diet soda is going to offset the cholent, kishke and kichel?

Dole lettuce salad. I thought we were supposed to be kavod shabbos, I highly doubt that serving dole lettuce even counts as salad, yet so many frummies do this.

People who insist on filling the washing cup to the very top even if it holds a gallon of water.

Being forced to say a devar torah for desert!

If you liked this post check out these similar posts:

Annoying things that happen in shul (video)

Are you mad that some events have mixed seating?

Are you pissed off that people say Im Yirtza Hashem by you all the time?