Parshas Vaera with a twist

Real TV

We have this exclusive video sent in by an anonymous person who caught the King of Egypt on tape going to the Bathroom in the Nile, and then all of the sudden the Nile turns red.

We have made several copies because the EPA is investigating the bloody water scandal which they believe Pharaoh may have had something to do with. They tell our editors that sometimes in swimming pools there is a special chemical that warns swimmers when someone has urinated in the pool by turning red. They are wondering if the same thing happened in the Nile when Pharaoh went to the bathroom in it, since the video shows it turning red almost immediately afterwards. There is one other fuzzy figure in the video but he is too hard to see and may just be a body guard.

We have digitally enhanced the video and have been able to clearly make out Pharaoh running out to the river early in the morning looking around to make sure no one was watching and all of the sudden a men wielding a staff enters the area.Then the video stops and all of the sudden the river is red. We will be having continuing coverage of this breaking story.

“Please do not strike the frogs”

That’s what animal rights activists from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals were saying to a crowd of angry Egyptians wielding brooms and pitchforks near the Nile where a rather large ugly looking frog was threatening the mob of angry Egyptians who couldn’t take the croaking any longer.

“Enough is enough, PETA is just run by a bunch of rich Liberals who live in the burbs and can’t hear the croaking through their thick walls”

But to no avail PETA urged the prohibition of hunting while Egyptians laughed and continued their systematic killing of the frogs. Which in fact made the population double.

Separate article:

Letter to the editor:

Could the inexplicable events that have been happening lately be due to El Nino or possibly Global Warming. What else can explain hail in Egypt let alone hail with fire inside. Until the boils Necromancers could come up with all sorts of excuses but now with the latest bout of bad weather so to speak, we are all empty with explanations. I know I will get in trouble for this next statement, but what if its something else?