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5 reasons why girls should be able to put tefillin on

woman wearing tefillinI’m pretty sure that the frum world is on high alert at the possible infiltration of Open Orthodoxy to our heimishe institutions such as SAR and Ramaz, who have decided to allow women to don tefillin. Ramaz took it one step further than SAR and said they will allow girls to put on tefillin in coed minyanim. Although there is no word as to whether or not the girls will be counted in the minyan, sources tell me that many folks are fearful that this is the beginning of the end. Apparently the more medrnishe Bais Yaakov’s are next. In my opinion, breaking tradition is perfectly acceptable when there are valid reasons to do so. Allowing girls to experiment with tefillin is akin to letting kids smoke that first cigarette.

1) It’s easier to classify women who wear tefillin: Instead of trying to figure out what stream of Judaism a certian girls or woman comes from, you can now just ask them what they think of women who wear tefillin. This is far easier than asking them what their tznius levels may be. It’s also easier than judging women based on their methods of hair covering or whether they wear pants or not.

2) Upper arms are sexy: There’s nothing like some good upper action to look at during pisukei d’zimra, I’m all about ervah in the morning, especially when some BT is up there taking all day. I assume that Orthodoxy, no matter how open it gets, will keep the whole mechitza thing.

3) It prevents intermarriage: In a world where there are girls who literally have no idea what tefillin is, imagine the zechus to have girls not only know from tefillin, but they know how to scam that guy in the airport selling them by asking them where the other arm is. The more Jewy things they do, the less likely they will be to marry goyim.

4) Maybe they will one day be frum: Maybe by taking on extra mitzvos for the wrong reasons (in the frum community they seem to think every girl who wants to go beyond the letter of the law is a raging feminist) they will eventually see the beauty of miitzvos they have to do, like shabbos candles and supporting their husbands gemara habits.

5) Safrus Industry boost: If enough frum girls started wearing tefillin and since they were frum, they needed it to be kosher, this could mean a boom for the safrus industry. The safrus industry has taken a serious hit in the internet age where every sefer is online. I do fear that many sofers may sell passul tefillin to girls in the hope that they make bracha livatala’s because of their obvious lack of tznius.

{ 71 comments… add one }
  • Anonymous January 23, 2014, 5:31 AM

    Will the underground Lubabitsher Rebbe now have Chabad’s Hot Chanies put Tefillin on any hot, just possibly Jewish woman.

    Where in NYC will I be able to observe this?

    • Obviously January 23, 2014, 10:14 AM

      You were once satmar.

    • FactsRule January 23, 2014, 2:43 PM

      Wow, what did the Lubavitcher Rebbe, zt”l, do to you that you have so much stupid evil hatred as to take a funny piece & direct it into your hate-filled stupid world. Go observe it in your local psych ward, putz.

    • SDK January 24, 2014, 9:16 PM

      I am not brave enough to ask the Lubavitchers if I can lay tefillin. But I wish someone braver but also more pious and more gently provocative than I am would do so.

      After a certain age, most women have no desire to expose their upper arms in front of a bunch of people staring at them for doing something unusual. The (F) rabbi at our (C) shul lays tefillin and they look good on her. But she’s a solid 10-15 younger than I am.

      The problem is that since walking away from teshuva about 20 years ago, I have a long to-do list of sorely neglected mitzvot — for example, manage to get up for shacharit more than once every 2 months, say mincha regularly, memorize bracha acharona so I don’t have to keep singing that annoying brich rachamana Jewish renewal song over and over again, oh right and actually keep Shabbos and re-kasher my kitchen which has fallen on hard times and loose morals.

      Maybe, after I tackle all that, I will get to tefillin before 120. But if these girls who are obviously way ahead of me in the mitzvah department want to start now, who am I to judge? Didn’t the L. rebbe say that?

      • And Sarah Laughed January 26, 2014, 12:17 PM

        I actually once did ask a Chabad shaliach if I could wrap tefillin. He thought I was asking if I could put them away, so he said yes… He was pretty shocked.

        Haha, I like the brich rachama Jewish renewal song. 🙂

  • David January 23, 2014, 1:17 PM

    Wait, you mean there are Jewish school’s so far off the derekh they would admit Michal bat Shaul HaMelekh, and Rashi’s daughters to boot? What kind of den of iniquity and goyishe values are these places? Apikorisim! Feministikim! Reformnikim!

  • Anon January 23, 2014, 4:22 PM

    You don’t need to presumptuously bring your tefillin up to the apartment for drinks after dinner.

  • Talia bat Pessi January 23, 2014, 6:23 PM


  • Dave January 24, 2014, 8:24 AM

    If a woman pays for the dinner on a tefillin date she should be able to lay tefillin during shacharit at they guy’s apartment before doing the Walk Of Shame

    • A. Nuran January 26, 2014, 9:04 PM

      Better she should lay one or the other on a date, not both.

  • Anon January 25, 2014, 6:30 PM

    Wow – you’re one of the few websites that this guy links to: http://www.schneerson.org.il/amudim/main.html

  • D-Dog January 26, 2014, 9:22 AM

    My gut says this one is satire.

    • Dan January 26, 2014, 12:41 PM

      No, this one is real. I know because Heshy always emails me and tells me which ones are real and which are fake.

      • D-Dog January 26, 2014, 5:29 PM

        You can’t fool me: I read a recent tell-all expos, in which “In an unprecedented move for a blogger, Heshy Fried came clean on Facebook and Twitter last night, admitting that his entire blog was a lie.” Of course, then again, I did glean this snippet from his blog… Which is a “total lie”. But then, is the confession a lie too? And if so, how can I be sure it’s a total lie, if it’s a lie that it’s a lie. Can I please be subscribed to the secret feed that clarifies?

  • And Sarah Laughed January 26, 2014, 12:24 PM

    Heshy, I’m sorry to disappoint you, but… there are women I know who dress tznius and wear tefillin; they put the tefillin on and then pull the sleeve down over it.

    • D-Dog January 26, 2014, 5:22 PM

      It should be possible to tzniusly do it. I’m sure that if a Bais din can witness a female ger immerse l’shem geirus, a few tefillin muffin-tops can be discreetly concealed: where there’s a will, there’s a way. Her Tallis is good for that, no? What am I missing?

  • Minucha January 26, 2014, 6:51 PM

    Heshy, you goofed. You posted this same subject both before & after the post on shatnez.

  • Minucha January 26, 2014, 6:55 PM

    Heshy, my apologies! You did not post this article twice.

  • AC January 28, 2014, 11:43 PM

    This is going to sound pretty weird but I can’t find any information comparing modern people to ancient people in regards to flatulence.

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