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Overweight shidduch dating site: Why not?

Before you crucify me, I’m actually being serious here. I saw someone on facebook had shared overweightdate.com and wondered when such a site would be created for frum people. It seems like all the dating sites geared towards the Orthodox Jewish singles community are devoted to the entire community, rather than one segment. When I was single I always wished there was a site for outdoors people or folks into toilet humor. Lets face it, people do care a bit much about weight.

What may be considered over weight is debatable, but whenever I want to set people up, I always ask if they care how skinny or large the person is. Girls sometimes like large guys, but seldom do I meet a guy willing to date a larger girl – so I’m sure there must be an exasperated shidduch crisis within the chubby and large frum singles community. Especially after my satire piece from earlier in the day where we see people caring so much about the need for makeup, I imagine that the obesity problem in the US is no less in the frum community than elsewhere.

I also know that for reason, the bigger the couple the better the marriage. I’ve witnessed it countless times, bigger people  seem happier together than the rest of population. Luckily there is plenty of intermarriage between the weights and it seems that those couples are also quite satisfied with each other. The hot couples always seem out of whack.

I also imagine that there are thin folks who may be looking for someone with “more” middos, that’s the tznius way of saying heavier….so why not create a frum version of overweight date?

For more shidduch ideas see 4torah.com

{ 37 comments… add one }
  • Been Up Been Down March 21, 2012, 12:16 AM

    I am touched by the sensitivity you used to write this. As a sneaky shadchun, I would love to see this. As a frustrated shadchun, I find that many people are not as realistic as they could be. It saddens me when guys won’t give a larger girl (size 10) a chance. Until you pointed it out, I never noticed how much happier larger couples tend to be.

    • Anonymous March 21, 2012, 7:18 AM

      HA! Size 10. I make you a bet, if the girl was 5″8, blond and a size 10 the guys would be chomping at the bit to date her. It’s only bc most frum girls are so short, being a size 10 is considered “grois”.
      Make sure you let the boys know that size is relative to height!

      • Dan March 21, 2012, 7:37 AM

        Nope. Once I hear size 10, I’m on to the next resume.
        Gotta get through the pile somehow.

        • OfftheDwannaB March 21, 2012, 8:01 AM

          Haha! Dan, you’re such a fuckin asshole, it’s awesome.

          • Anonymous March 21, 2012, 8:21 AM

            But how do you hear size 10?? If 4 is the number to be, she will just put 4 on the resume and show up being a size 10 blond bombshell. Least that’s what I would do if I were blond…
            bleaching it tonight!

            • Dan March 21, 2012, 8:30 AM

              I always go to a department store by the 3rd date, and play “dress up”.

          • Dan March 21, 2012, 8:49 AM

            ah. OTDWB, your comment makes it all worth it.

  • bonne March 21, 2012, 1:04 AM

    I dig it.

  • KosherUnicorn March 21, 2012, 4:07 AM

    Will there also be a frum gay overweight shidduch site? It could be called TatiBear.com 🙂

    – Yisroel

    • CM in CH March 21, 2012, 5:50 AM

      I think we have a winner here!

    • Heshy Fried March 21, 2012, 11:00 PM

      So I guess the frum polar bears could be called whatever that rabbi who grew the gray beard overnight’s name was.

  • Anonymous March 21, 2012, 7:19 AM

    What size is considered overweight for girls in the frum community?

    • Up and down March 21, 2012, 7:51 AM

      I hear the guys want no larger than a 4. The majority of the population is size 14 or larger. Do the math. See Dan’s comment above. I do not want to start any hostility because I believe that people NEED to be attracted to each other, but be realistic about what you are bringing to the table. Are you Brad Pitt with his bank account? Frum boys think that they have diamonds between their legs because the girls and their parents allow it. Let the eating disorders begin.

      • Dan March 21, 2012, 7:56 AM

        We win!

        • Anonymous March 21, 2012, 8:16 AM

          ok but how does the guy know what size she is assuming she is anywhere between a 6 and 10? Girls who are btwn 5″6 and 5″8 and are between size 6 and 10 – you cant really tell the actual number. Is it just anything above emaciated lollypop head is too big?
          Guys, fill me in! I want to know!

          • Up and Down March 21, 2012, 3:03 PM

            I think that they do not know, but want to impress their equally shallow friends. I know very thin short guys who want the same in girls. I get that. It is the 300 pound guy with his shirt buttons popping and his muffin top spreading over his pants that wants Angelina Jolie that makes no sense. There is a pot for every cover. All should keep an open mind. In closing there is nothing more pathetic than the size 2 when she hits 40+ and thinks that she is as hot as she was when she was 19 (some are, most are not). If your importance revolves around your looks and not your intellect, kindness, tzedakah,etc. you will be a sad person once the bloom is off the rose.

  • Dan March 21, 2012, 8:33 AM

    I’ve actually got an interesting theory, but perhaps don’t have enough info to know the answer to this.

    My theory is, that super skinny girls look a lot better dressed than they do undressed. But we only see them dressed when we are dating, and we don’t know enough to know that size 2 will means ribs sticking out like starving children in africa.

    If so, the solution to the shidduch crisis is to have more YU Beacon teffilin dating.

  • Stanley Katz March 21, 2012, 9:25 AM

    For the most part frum girls have lousy legs

  • Michaltastik March 21, 2012, 10:15 PM

    Yeah, ever since I dropped 30 pounds everyone wants to set me up with horrible guys. It makes me want to gain the weight back so I can be left alone.

  • emunah March 24, 2012, 8:16 PM

    frankly I don’t get it – are guys really so obsessed with skinny? I think it’s more important how the face looks. Now I understand why these gaunt chicks are so conceited 😀

    • Dan March 24, 2012, 10:07 PM

      Well, what’s important is what we think, not what you think.

      And it’s better this way. Ugly faces can’t really be fixed, while anyone can lose weight.

      • emunah March 24, 2012, 10:53 PM

        True, true. That’s why I’m puzzled. You can always try to encourage your wife to more healthy lifestyle, but plastic surgery to fix ugly face is expensive and potentially dangerous. That’s why I don’t get it.

        And by the way – I’m size 2-4 depending on clothes’ manufacturer but I consider myself too skinny.

        • Dan March 25, 2012, 6:24 AM

          And I was drunk when I posted that. Sorry if it came across too bluntly.

          • emunah March 25, 2012, 2:32 PM

            I’m not going to marry you anyway 😉

            • Dan March 25, 2012, 2:36 PM

              Good. Because I only marry girls have have lap-band surgery. Because then I know we’re playing for keeps.

              • emunah March 25, 2012, 2:44 PM

                I can’t marry you, I’m married and probably twice your age 🙂 And never been on a diet 😀

                • Dan March 25, 2012, 2:48 PM

                  I’m 14. But I know of plenty of 28 year olds I’d do.

                  • Amar June 28, 2012, 11:26 AM

                    Haha watta boss. Im 17 and I’d do that too brother.

  • emunah March 25, 2012, 2:50 PM

    Oh… So I am almost three time your age, in some cultures I could be your grandma 😀

    • Dan March 25, 2012, 3:27 PM

      You are quite the cougar, flirting with 14 year olds on the internet. 🙂

  • emunah March 25, 2012, 5:40 PM

    I wouldn’t call it flirting 🙂 All the time I think I offer you the reality check 😀

  • Michael Makovi March 29, 2012, 1:12 PM

    I’m still waiting for a site for nerds and intellectuals and the like. It’s really frustrating flipping through sites like Frumster and such: half the girls don’t even write an essay about themselves, and the other half say something like, “I’m nice and pretty and like unicorns and rainbows and cooking and having guests for Shabbos and I want a ben Torah with good middos”. It take a long time to flip through all the non-essays and all the vapid airhead essays, and find the ones with any intellectual substance to them.

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