When I asked for ideas on Facebook (click the link to add me as a friend) for the following list people got it all wrong, they suggested long sentence type of things and I was really looking for one word answers. Although all of the other answers I received got me thinking about future lists I can do regarding the ways of frum folks, for now this is merely a list of frum things.
- Weak handshakes
- Not standing in line
- Sprint
- Motzi Shabbos Pizza
- Sushi
- Deli Roll
- Minivans
- Black
- Chinese Auctions
- Yinglish
- Readers Digest
- Rush Limbaugh
- Tea sense
- Wine fountains
- Amazing Savings
- Vegetable soap
- Precut toilet paper
- Thumb Dipping
- Noisy family meals
- Corner car dealerships
- Black velvet anything
- Shabbos robes
- Hat boxes
- Hatzaloh
- Vaad Hatznius
- Kollel
- Camp-made shtenders
- Wheels to lease
- Blechs
- Kishke
- Kugalech
- Kosherland
- Siyum Hashas
- Pirchei
- Pre-pubescent boys choirs
- Chosson and Kallah beds
- Shidduch dating
- Pekalech
- Golden Flow
- Chavrusa Tumult
- Light boxes (for veggies)
- Shabbos lamps
- Shabbos tooth paste
- chrayonaise
- Weekday cholent
- Herring
- Veckers
- Peyos
- Washing cup basins
- Mishpacha Magazine
- Poor table manners
- Psshh (as congratulations)
- Shkoyach (not yasher koach)
- Shalashudos
- Doing the Daf
- Wrongly using the word By
- Shabbos Goy
- Spelling errors
- Musar
- Chaverim (frum triple A)
- Nu (how ya doing)
{ 68 comments… read them below or add one }
Little boys with long hair.
You nailed it.62. Tax dodgers.
61: Nu – How ya doing?
Nu is also the word you say when you cant say anything else – esp after washing.
Nu: Hurry up and cut the challah, I’m starving!
Nu: What’s your problem?
Nu: Where’s the challah knife? Who set this table anyway?!
Nu: Stop fighting!
Nu: I can’t believe you just burped at the table in front of our BT guests! You know they have table manners and will think we are boors!
would love to see a list for modern orthodox
I concur.
I will be attempting to do all sects and then when that’s done – I kind of want to do 50 frum statement, or 50 things BT’s would say…stuff like that.
That would be cool.
And then 50 things frum people are unlikely to say.
…and seltzer!
…and switching up Yiddish and English prepositions (hence “eating by so-and-so” or “what’s doing by you?”)!
I heard that…
“Nu?” probably goes in more contexts than “dude!”, its modern goyish equivalent
Answering all questions with “Baruch Hashem.”
I don’t know why but I laughed so hard my eyes started to tear. This is such good stuff.
How are you? – Baruch Ha-Shem (let me just say this is not an answer)
My uncle once replied to my BH with”Now that I know how frum you are, how are you doing?”
I like your uncle. Sounds like a funny guy.
Excuse me for being Yiddish-deprived, but what are veckers?
Tea sense??? Do you mean “tea essence,” the stuff that you squeeze out of the tea bags before Shabbos to mix with pre-heated water and use as a substitute for freshly-brewed tea on Shabbat?
Vekker = Waker, someone who wakes the yeshiva boys up for shacharis.
Heshy,
You know far more about the community whence which I grew up in than I’d previously given you credit for. Props.
KMIS
Just a list of Jewsh words and things. Weak. Like a frum handshake. But I hope others zoom in on the cartoon of Gehenom and read the text.
Just a couple of well-deserving additions:
Soda
Bathrobes
Potatoes
Beef
Ferragamo belts and shoes
Odysseys
WIC
How could you forget sheitels!
And excuse my ignorance, but what’s “Golden Flow”?
Golden Flow. What does it sound like?
Well, it’s not that!
It’s a brand of cholov yisroel milk.
Thanks, Mark.
And no… I didn’t think it was “that”
Plus I guess it’s only available in the US cause I’ve never seen it before (I live in Toronto).
- Sterling silver and cherrywood furntiure/chachkas (like challah boards, or esrog holders)
-Mayim Achronim – its a toss up between styrofoam cups or something fancy.
- Calling something a “crisis” (perhaps due to a lack of english vocabulary)
- Basement Businesses
- Breakaway minyans or communities
- Quoting Gedolim
- Jackets with hoods big enough to cover black hats (we have them in Canada)
YES, I was going to say hyper-ornate silver-plated anything, to give your home a little fake Alte Heim flavor.
White collar crime.
Thinking that the US government is hashem…(As in “Hashem will provide”)
Getting such benefits while decrying other races that do the same thing.
Not getting legally married in order to drain even more while having 12 babies by the babydaddy….
Does this last happen? Provide source!
all the time.
FRWM is an acronym:
F-ood stamps
R-ent subsidies
W-ic (aka “The Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants and Children”)
M-edicare
It sounds like you feel very strongly about the subject. Would you like to talk about it?
I much prefer infrotamive articles like this to that high brow literature.
ejFndo nbojitymwalr
Assuming that if it’s universal in Brooklyn, all frum people will automatically know what you are talking about. News flash–”frum” does not mean “Brooklynite!”
Sprint… Guess that’s why they still exist…
Didn’t you do a list like this a few months back? I remember we had some good ones.
“The Schmooze” magnets
Omg if one more person tells me to listen to the shmooze I’m gonna go balistic.
Back-yard cmaps and basement storess (both are totally Shtetelfabulous).
Back-yard camps and basement storess (both are totally Shtetelfabulous).
I’m not sure if this is common in other communities. But, in Monsey, no one refers to shuls by their official names. It’s always Rabbi so-and-so’s.
Yep, I daven by last name…
All the time in Queens have I heard so many people… I daven by Ganz… though, he seems to have retired. One of his peeps is on here, maybe he’s heard this to, nu?
Also, referring to to people, including yourself, by last name.
“telling over”
Borsalino hats
white on white shirts
kosher notions sticks on everything (BTs have these too)
taking ma’iser on any fruit that might come from israel
not eating any green leafy vegetable of any kind — in case of bugs
well- done steak (Heshy, you told me about this one)
maiyse she’huyuh
chavrusa bro-mances
Chinese auctions for Oorah
Mendel the Mouse
Swecky’s eyebrows
Station wagons with wood panels
14th avenue
slichos for be’hab
“(BTs have these too)”
WTF? So, BTs aren’t frum enough that you have to specify when they do things “real frum” do?
touchy touchy.
BTs are frum too — I was thinking that kosher notions labels would be better for their list too.
BTW, you are sexy when you are angry — just like Yankel is when he gets hot under the collar. You guys should meet and talk about why satire sites that are designed to offend a little bit, offend a little bit.
Yes
Michaltastik
1. I was thinking that kosher notions labels would be better on the BT list. Sorry for the implications that BT’s are CH’vSh not real frum. You are right. chatasi. (mea colpa)
2. You are hot when you are upset — much like the way Yankel is too. You guys should get together and work out some emotional tension. It would be fun. You could talk about how satire sites that are intended to offend some people sometimes, happen to offend you sometimes.
love.
fresca
gala
heirring
oneg shabbos heirring
smaltz
stiglitz
yaptzug
a gesheft hub ich
poza on rosh hashanah
chick peas
ah zucher
vach nacht
shlishkes
Shabbos Party
nosh
pale pink nail polish (and no other color)
lady’s suits
matching the whole family
But where are the Drake’s Cakes?
Pas nisht – it’s not cholov yisroel
How about “X secular things are really frum” or “Y frum things that really aren’t”?
-Nose-picking (while davening/eating/sleeping..wait that’s plenty of non-frummies..but they’re better at it)
-Chewing with your mouth open.
-nose-scrunching when thinking (reading/sleeping).
-whatchamacallit.
-”davka”
-dandruff
-flat-footed, duckfooted walking (wait that’s Most jews too..but again, they’re masters of it).
-not running (I know, there’s something in the Ramah/MB about not running unless it’s absolutely necessary).
flat-footed that’s charlie Chaplin, isn’t it?
not running is only on shabbos or yomtov, unless its for a dvar mitzva.
i think you’re referring to pisios gasos- big steps, which i also once heard is assur…though I’m not sure from where
Pretty sure the ‘not running’ unless necessary is held by some, APART from Shabbat/YT, which I knew – in fact one of the first things I learned.. In Yeshivah in Israel had a BT Chassidic rabbi explaining about having to break the “habit” of running to get somewhere faster, his example was davka catching the bus when other Chassidim were around. Not knowing HOW to run is very yeshivish too.
Jews b’klalit also tend to chew with their mouths open more than goyim – but Charedim are louder and more nuanced.
And that “ts[uh]“, Israeli/Jewish tongue-on-the-roof of the mouth noise made in judgement, criticism, thought-formation (sounds like starting to pronounce a tzaddi, and changing your mind). I’ve “caught” at-risk adults/teens this way when out and about town when they were otherwise camouflaged as goyim.
Heshy:
This.
use of the word “stunning”
women over use it to the point where whatever or WHO ever they are talking about is probably chalooshisly ugly.
Overuse of the word “interesting” when talking with non-Orthodox.
Use of the phrase “You don’t understand” to people who the only ones who DO understand…
When “doing kiruv rechokim/krovim” or trying to “draw someone closer to yiddishkeit”, saying “y’understand?” during an argument or dialogue to lead the listeners into unconsciously agreeing with them after a long series of assents to “y’understand?”, even if what they say is pashut BS if you listened without assenting…
people hearing without listening…
Simon and Garfunkel (one of my favorite)
Annoying use of the term “Very Nice”, as in;
“Where do you live?” Answer: “I live in Brooklyn”
Response: “Very niiiiice”.
i disagree. i live there and hate it.
Snitch = Tell out
Anihilate = Kill out
Blind date = Go out
Prove wrong = Shtuch out
Embarrassed = booshed out
Resulted in = it came out
Negel vasser
Sunflower seeds and beer
Bartenura
Vus hertzach
referring to people by their last name. as in, ‘klein is going to lakewood tomorrow and he can bring you this package that i packed in a plastic bag for you.’ also, sending packages to your kids who live in lakewood/monsey with any jew you happen to meet in shul. freeloading!
Saying “What’s your name?” and expecting people to tell you there last name.