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Saw You At Sinai Sucks

Saw You At Sinai has accomplished a few things for me at once, it has made me feel that much better about leaving the east coast, taught me that I’m that much cooler than most of the frum folks out there and gave me a new idea as to why the shidduch crisis may just be a scam after all.

I have refrained from joining Saw You At Sinai (SYAS) for many moons, not because I wasn’t ready to give up the outdoors for a life of diapers and deli roll, but because I feared that I would be set up with too many girls – all who according to SYAS have a ten day expiration date and lose good matches, because I was busy figuring out which of these multiple girls I wanted. Basically, SYAS seemed like such a grueling task that I didn’t want any part of.

One bitter cold January evening I decided to join, I wasn’t feeling lonely, I wasn’t feeling desperate, I was just heeding the advice of people who told me I was having too much fun (is that possible) and that since I had finally found a career I should now look for a wife – I could use a cuddling partner, but a wife? Well, I guess a cuddling partner could lead to that.

No sooner than hitting “pay” was I set up with 5 girls, almost like the shadchanim were stalking me, the freshest meat on the site and then bam they hit me. I’m not gonna lie, it felt good, until I read the profiles that is. You see SYAS profiles mostly suck because the shadchanim don’t force you to write anything, they have all these check boxes for personality type and things you like to do – I always wonder about the girls who check the box for “skate and bike parks”

So I went to reject the girls and similar to the way AOL used to make it hell for you to cancel an account, I had to jump through loops as to why these girls weren’t suitable for me – so I just picked at random, most were not quantifiable – but it really just had to do with my version of the Geographically Undesirable girl – pretty much anyone who lives in the New York or Miami Metro areas, basically, if you’re from somewhere I wouldn’t want to vacation I don’t want anything to do with you – it’s deeper than that, but that’s the gist of it.

Some people fear flying, others fear dogs, my biggest fear in life is marrying a girl from a place I dislike and having her want to move back home (I have noticed a trend in girls wanting to move close to their parents once they pop out a couple of kids) Along with this fear is being forced to spend my vacation time or holidays in places like Miami, Lakewood or Far Rockaway, etc…I also have a fear of dating girls who never lived out of the home, or far from mommy and daddy, I like em independent.

So the 24 year old from Brooklyn who went to bais yaakov and lives at home had to go and so on…

Finally after canceling all of these matches, they just kept sending me match after match – to the point where I’ve decided to quit the site, it’s really too much and I have some potential matches out of the SYAS realm that have recently developed, but those aside, I really wanted to gripe about Saw You At Sinai.

They have 33,000 members and 581 matches, is that good? I guess it can’t be a bad thing, they are making bank and the shadchanim are working on commission, I wonder if any of them have been making good dough? Who does it for the money anyway?

So I asked a lady friend of mine about why I’m getting so many matches and she looked at me like I was crazy and told me that she has gotten less matches sent to her in two years than I have gotten in two weeks and what’s funny is she’s not a bad looking gal, super cool and lives within the 5 boroughs, so what gives? I have several theories, one is that there are way more women than men willing to join SYAS and therefore they have been forced to send us that many more matches or maybe I’m fresh meat or maybe I’m that much cooler than everyone out there.

{ 99 comments… add one }
  • mimi February 23, 2011, 4:04 AM

    I had an idea for a dating website for non-Creationists: sawyouatthebigbang.com.

    • Anonymous February 24, 2011, 12:10 AM

      At the singularity, presumably.

  • Shrink February 23, 2011, 4:13 AM

    The shidduch crisis is a scam. I have said it all along. If you compare the frum communities’ rate of marriage, and average age of getting married to mainstream society, we are fairing so much better. So how can you call it a crisis? The issue is our frame of reference. Reality is not all will get married and there is nothing wrong with not finding your partner till you’re ( gasp!) in your late 20s. In our grandparents generation, this is how it was (other than for the chassidim). So why are we so special that our partners should just fall into our laps and we should get everything we want and think we deserve/are entitled to, and not have to date anymore AT AGE 21! WTF?

    • BiggestFish February 26, 2011, 8:53 PM

      @ Shrink – It is a crisis if a girl is 28 years old and can’t get a normal shidduch suggestion.
      It is a crisis if she has gone on less than 10 dates in the last 10 years and no dates in the last 2-3 years.
      How does one get married if they don’t get redt dates?

      How old are you Shrink to think this way? Perhaps you are male too?

      • Yoreh K'Chetz February 26, 2011, 9:41 PM

        There is no crisis. A crisis would occur when their aer no more men or women left to marry, which is far from the case.

        I suspect the current situation came about from people being too picky about details before agreeing to meet someone. Background searches on the family, unqualified idiots pasing themselves of as shadchans, and all the other ridiculous things people do to try to ensure the perfect match, it’s no wonder you get thousands of “aging” singles.

        • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 9:54 AM

          @ Yoreh K’Chetz –
          Trust me the girls I kn0w are not picky. They are desperate. They will take any guy. A girl I know heard of a boy, the mother said “he gets 15 resumes a week!”
          Tell me how does a guy get 15 resumes a week and a girl gets none in 2 years?
          This girl I know would take any guy as long as he had half a brain on his head and could spell. She got redt a Learning Disabled guy, the LD guy was nice, but not too bright.
          How does a smart girl marry an LD guy?!?
          And you call her picky? You say it is peoples pickiness.
          Trust me, past the age of 27 there are like 400 girls to 1 guy.

          • Yoreh K'chetz (aka Phil) February 27, 2011, 10:12 AM

            Biggest fish,

            AS long as the guy to girl birth ratio remains even, there can be no natural crisis. The current situation is a by-product of people not wanting someone that may come from a slightly different background or not fit into the cookie cut mold of what they are looking for.

            I know of parents that vetoed marriages simply because one was ashkenaz and one was sephardi, deciding for their children in advance that the marriage would be doomed to failure. Never mind that they were both healthy, Jewish, in love and committed to raising their kids at frum Jews, seems like what their neighbors may have said was more important.

            Another example is a few chassidim I know that had sons that became more “modern”. They suddenly weren’t good enough for their own community’s girls, so they went elsewhere and found wives. Result is that those communities are now missing some boys, and horror of horrors, some of the girls are forced to either look elsewhere as well, or be stuck going on (literally) blind dates (deafs, retards as well).

            First thing people need to do, is get rid of shadchans. These are the people that thought they were helping by matching people up, seems like they’ve done more good than harm over the past 20-30 years.

            Next, the rabbis need to legalized multiple wives again. In this day and age, families can use and extra hand, as well as extra income. It would alleviate pressure on the first wife, also boost the frum birthrate immensely.

            Most important, families need to either chill out or butt out. If people are having trouble getting dates, last thing you need is to have the nosy mother in law get the FBI file on the potential gal or guy, in addition to requesting their kindergarden records and rummaging through their garbage to see if the milk they drink and water they drink has at least 3 hechshers.

            • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 1:10 PM

              @ Yoreh K’chetz (aka Phil) –
              You are wrong. You say the birth ratio is even. (actually slightly more females to males, but that’s not the issue.)
              Girls start dating after Seminary, guys after 4 or 5 years in Beis Medrash, so when a guy starts dating at 23 or 24, he can date 18-24 year old girls, much bigger pool, and he picks one, usually younger. Next year the 24 year old females are 25 and it is harder to get married. The female pool is bigger than the male pool and the older females are left without a seat in this game of musical chairs. Next year more females come on the market, more competition and younger too.
              Every guy wants hot and younger! Who doesn’t!

              As to chassidishe bums, why should a girl take a chassidishe bum. Their own communities won’t take them. Let them marry in their own chassidus!

              Are you Phil the Angler. You used to fish for carp?

              • Yoreh K'chetz (aka Phil) February 28, 2011, 5:06 AM

                Biggest fish,

                The older to younger dating thing defies the laws of arithmetic.
                1) Older guys have been marrying younger women since the beginning of mankind, but this so called crisis has only appeared over the past 10 years or so, and only among frum Jews.

                2) Their are plenty of older unmarried guys around. Do you know many 26-28 year old girls that would consider dating a 40 year old guy?

                And yes, I still fish for carp, just waiting for the ice to melt and for them to come out of hibernation.

              • Yoreh K'chetz (aka Phil) February 28, 2011, 5:12 AM

                Biggest fish,

                RE: Chassishe “bums”.

                Many of these guys aren’t exactly bums. They are wrongly considered “bums” by those who shun any hint of modernity. These groups have a mold for each kid, if you don’t fit into the mold, you’re either a bum or OTD, often kicked out of the community.

                In reality, many are smart and motivated kids. Under the proper guidance they prosper, and often make it big once they leave yeshiva.

                Now, I ask you, who is more of a bum, the guy that trims his beard and runs a successful business, or the guy with long payis that comes to mooch from him?

                • BiggestFish February 28, 2011, 2:10 PM

                  @ Yoreh K’chetz (aka Phil) –
                  1) 26 year old woman and 40 year old guy, very large age difference. By the time he is 60 she is 46. Do you know how big an age difference that is?
                  2) The only thing you can offer a 26 year old is a 40 year old guy?! Speaks for the sad state of shidduchim in this community.
                  3) The only 27 or 28 year old males that are left are either very picky or got something wrong.
                  4) As to chassidishe bums, if he’s different from his family and not as chassidishe, that is one thing.
                  But..
                  a) some bums are big into the drug scene. I’m not saying all, but some….
                  b) Sometimes, when a chassidishe guy wants a less chassidishe girl it is because the guy is slow or has some limp, or maybe he is diabetic and no one in the chassidishe world wants him, but they will tell your daughter to marry him, even though they don’t consider him good enough for their own daughter. Typical.

              • Yochanan February 28, 2011, 11:03 AM

                Am I the only mid-twenties guy who would prefer to date someone around my age (3 younger and 2 older)?

        • Yochanan February 28, 2011, 10:56 AM

          Look at this article saying that men in China outnumber women by 35 million. Now there’s a Shiddukh crisis!

          http://timeinmoments.wordpress.com/2009/04/12/sex-ratio-in-china-as-boys-outnumber-girls-by-35-million/

      • Shrink February 27, 2011, 9:32 AM

        I’m a 32 year old transgendered post op male. Hence, I see things from both sides

        • mimi February 27, 2011, 9:54 AM

          A crisis only exists if you consider being single a crisis, which I don’t anymore. Being single is just as lovely and/or awful as being in a relationship.

          Years ago I went on a lot of shidduch dates. It wasn’t right for me. I never could get into dating websites either. Personally, I think if you spend a lot of time doing things that you love the people that you meet will be other people doing that same thing. A good way to meet someone you could have a relationship with is to spend as much time as possible engaged in activities that make you happy. And even if it doesn’t “work”, at least you know you you’ll enjoy the process.

          Everyone is different though. No one piece of dating advice can possibly be true for everyone.

          • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 9:20 PM

            @ Mimi –
            I agree. Lots of older singles are bitter and keep obsessing about being married.
            However, there are advantages to being single. Life is about making the best of your situation and if you are single you can use that to your advantage.
            You have financial freedom.
            You can go on vacations anywhere, whenever.
            You can pursue advanced education.
            You can pursue hobbies and develop your talents instead of paying rent or diaper bills.

            • Yochanan February 28, 2011, 11:07 AM

              Yeah, but no Halakhically sanctified sex.

        • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 9:56 AM

          @ Shrink – More power to you! What are your plans? Looking for a man or a woman? Who will carry your babies?
          Yasher Koach!

          • Shrink February 27, 2011, 2:40 PM

            I think I am going to take it pretty easy on dating and children for now. Thnx for asking. My shidduch stock tanked once I started the hormone treatments.

            • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 9:16 PM

              @Shrink – I understand perfectly.

  • elana February 23, 2011, 4:27 AM

    O.k., how about Saw you in the nursing home sad and alone wearing nothing but a depends and a Frum Satire shirt that has oatmeal stains on it, with no wife by your side and no children to bring you a nice sandwich every once in a while??? You are smart, you have a career and your kind of cute, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM? You are too picky and this is getting out of hand! The problem is you have to decide if you want everything or just some things, then work it out from there. Your core beliefs will find you the right girl, its not all about bike riding and communing with nature, now knock it off and get with it, times a wasting..

    • Heshy Fried February 23, 2011, 12:46 PM

      But my core beliefs are communing with nature – if I were to remain single I would probably end up alone in a cabin in Montana, I don;t really like people enough to hang out in a nursing home waiting to die.

      • elana February 23, 2011, 12:59 PM

        Oy,hanging out alone in a cabin in Montana usually results in the F.B.I. being called in and never ends well. I meant core “religious beliefs”

        • ghottistyx February 23, 2011, 8:52 PM

          Where has this happened aside from the Unibomber? I don’t see Heshy going down that road.

      • Avrumy February 24, 2011, 10:22 AM

        The BF and I are considering a Montana road trip this summer. Any suggestions? Wanna join us? Lots of hiking and Meal Mart shelf-life food. Chabad of Bozeman.

      • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:05 AM

        “if I were to remain single I would probably end up alone in a cabin in Montana, I don;t really like people enough to hang out in a nursing home waiting to die.”

        Played Dragon Age? Just as Grey Wardens go off into the Deep Roads to die at the hands of the Darkspawn, you can go off into Montana to wrestle a bear…

  • RTG February 23, 2011, 5:26 AM

    How about people post their sex, how long ago they joined the site, and how many suggestions they’ve received. I know that people may have went inactive for a while, but I guess this is the best way of evaluating it.
    As for me:
    Male, joined about a year ago, 86 matches.

  • soso February 23, 2011, 9:06 AM

    Well, in fact you confirmed that the shidduch crisis is real: Too many women, too few men, that’s why you got almost 600…

    • Heshy Fried February 23, 2011, 12:48 PM

      Actually I confirmed that women are more desperate than men to get married because their eggs are growing moldy and more willing to join datging sites like SYAS.

      • soso February 23, 2011, 2:39 PM

        Kind of a super-macho reply, a bit like your “geography refusal criterion”…

        • Heshy Fried February 27, 2011, 9:41 PM

          I don’t date girls who can’t walk out of their houses and climb a mountain

          • mimz May 11, 2015, 2:35 PM

            Im a frum female who craves the outdoor life and I once said something similar about the local guys ppl were pressuring me to date cause I was getting “old” …..so yea viva big sky Montana

      • dave crown April 26, 2018, 10:13 AM

        @Heshy. The Midrash relates a nothing less that extraordinary perspective about the Elevated Spiritual Level Of Jewish Women. When the Jews were slaves in Egypt the men were worked so hard that they were totally exhausted by nightfall when they came home and didn’t want to have any marital relations at all with their wives. The Jewish men said: ‘Why should we bring any more children into the World when they will only grow up to be slaves just like us.’ The Jewish Women not only dismisser their husbands’ ‘wisdom’, but went to the exact opposite extreme and deliberately went out of their way to pretty themselves up, fix their hair, put on whatever make-up they had, etc., so when the men came home their wives would be able to overwhelm even their most resistant husbands. The Midrash goes on further to explain that it was ONLY because of this Righteousness of the Jewish Women that Jewish babies continued to be born in Egypt and allowed the Jewish People to survive. The Rest Of the Story: When the Jews left Egypt

        • dave crown April 26, 2018, 10:18 AM

          @ Heshy (continued…)

          … and were about to build the Mishkan in the desert, Moshe remembered what the Jewish Women had done to help keep the Jewish People alive and wanted to Honor these Jewish Women. Moshe remembered

  • AlbanyFriend February 23, 2011, 9:08 AM

    Heshy, don’t take seriously the threats of being alone in a nursing home. You will find your besheret. Don’t rule out girls from the east coast, who knows? You might find a cross country skiing girl, who likes to hike, take long road trips in a suburu, eat vast amounts of cholent, and will enjoy (or pretend) listening to your rants living in northern California who originates from Monsey? Hypothetical, but possible. In all seriousness when the time comes you will find your match. We miss you in Northern New York!

    • elana February 23, 2011, 1:01 PM

      lol, I hope you no I was just joking! kinda..

  • I kissed a Jew and I liked it February 23, 2011, 9:28 AM

    I was on SYAS for YEARS! 90% of the matches sent were from the (not so) Greater NY area who were run of the mill Turo or YU grads who were unattractive.
    One Shadchan set me up with someone who was deaf – and didnt tell me so in advance. They would only correspond by email before the date – i didn’t realize why until it was too late.

    • yitz February 23, 2011, 10:30 AM

      omg!! awsome!!

    • Michaltastik February 24, 2011, 7:56 PM

      Someone wanted to set me up with a blind guy.

      • Yoreh K'Chetz February 24, 2011, 8:42 PM

        Michal,

        Look on the bright side, you wouldn’t need any makeup 😉

        Seriously though, I know of a few horror stories where anyone with a slightly undesirable trait in the family can get lumped in with the rejects pretty quickly. How the shadchans ever get the nerve to propose a blind, deaf or terminally ill match to a normal/healthy person is beyond me.

        • Hearing Impaired and Anonymous February 26, 2011, 8:49 PM

          Well, I am actually hearing impaired. I would not call myself deaf. As to being tricked and set up without being told, I wouldn’t advocate that.
          What I am more concerned about is the families. How many people who have siblings in their family who are blind, deaf, or hearing impaired have trouble with shidduchim? Just because of their siblings!?!

      • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:00 AM

        What, is there something wrong with blind people? (Other than their being blind?)

        • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:01 AM

          I mean a deaf problem would be a problem, because I don’t know sign language, but a blind girl, I’d be able to talk to her just fine, so I don’t see the problem. As long as her ears and her mouth work…

        • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:01 AM

          I mean being deaf would be a problem, because I don’t know sign language, but a blind girl, I’d be able to talk to her just fine, so I don’t see the problem. As long as her ears and her mouth work…

          • Hearing Impaired and Anonymous June 1, 2011, 10:13 AM

            Well, I don’t know any sign language. Is that a problem? Suprisingly I talk and communicate with my actual mouth! Weird huh!

            • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:30 AM

              I said the problem is that *I* do not know sign language. If I can hear her talk, but she cannot hear me talk, well, that’s no good, is it?

              • Hearing Impaired and Anonymous June 1, 2011, 10:32 AM

                No it is not good at all. It is very bad.

                • Hearing Impaired and Anonymous June 1, 2011, 10:34 AM

                  One more thing, you seem to suffer from a slight misunderstanding. Hearing impaired people can hear others talk, whether it is with residual hearing or a hearing aid or a cochlear implant.

                  • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:37 AM

                    That’s why I said “deaf”, not “hearing impaired”. If she is impaired such that she can still hear me talk, then I see no problem. I specifically used the word “deaf” for a reason.

                • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:35 AM

                  Indeed. So I’m still curious what problem others would see with a blind person.

                  • Hearing Impaired and Anonymous June 1, 2011, 10:45 AM

                    Well, as to me, I think that a blind person can’t really go on a hike or a bike ride and can’t really go skiing unless there is a guide behind him/her telling her the direction.
                    Also, I am a highly visual person and living with someone who never experiences sight would be difficult, I think, for me to deal with.

                    • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 10:51 AM

                      Okay, so it sounds like your own personality and interests specifically, make a blind man a liability.

                      I was just amazed at the commenters above who complained, without any commentary or explanation, as if it were the most self-evident thing, that “Someone wanted to set me up with a blind guy.” and “How the shadchans ever get the nerve to propose a blind … match to a normal/healthy person is beyond me.”

                      I’m reminded of a column in the Kidspost of the Washington Post a few years. There was something about military brats, and how their parents being in the military affected their lives. One of the children said something about how it involved being fed, “An apple – an APPLE”. I mean, heaven forfend, you poor child, your parent being in the military means you had to eat an apple (I forget why, but that’s not the point). Please excuse me while I go sob the living daylights of myself.

  • Leibel February 23, 2011, 11:02 AM

    The return on investment isn’t great there. I know it’s not easy to get married, but it wasn’t worth the money and there are other ways of getting dates that don’t cost money. People who know me as a person rather than a profile are better at setting me up than the Shadchanim at SYAS.

    • Heshy Fried February 23, 2011, 12:49 PM

      Facebook and blogging has worked much better for me

      • Bridge and Tunnel February 25, 2011, 10:39 AM

        Facebook worked for me too!
        *sigh* 😀

  • Ginger February 23, 2011, 12:59 PM

    Are there any guys like you who are about 6 years younger???

    • big jej February 23, 2011, 3:40 PM

      nope. hesh is unique

  • Yoreh K'chetz February 23, 2011, 2:05 PM

    What’s wrong with vacationing in Miami (especially during winter) ???

  • Joel February 23, 2011, 2:07 PM

    I was on Syas on and off( some months i paid some months i did not) pretty much since it started. I got over 700 matches: some hot, some cute, many nasty and a couple black. I enjoyed it cuz i took it with a grain of salt. Some girls were very interesting and some loved to travel and spend time with family I met my future wife on syas called her then didnt call her back. Four and a half years later I im’ed her on frumster and we got married eight months later on 90210.

  • Woodrow/Conservadox February 23, 2011, 7:44 PM

    SYAS is perfectly fine if you live in NYC and environs. If you are in the south or the west, not so much- there simply aren’t enough single women outside the East Coast frum heartland for you (or I) to get a decent number of matches.

  • Avrumy February 24, 2011, 10:20 AM

    SYAS does not seem to allow same sex shiduchim. 🙁
    Obama and the Justice Department will no longer support DOMA. 🙂

    • Yoreh K'Chetz February 24, 2011, 7:52 PM

      Avrumy,

      No sh*t, maybe their trying to run a credible service for people interested in REAL marriage…

      Here’s an idea for you and your deviant buddies, why don’t you start up some called “saw you in the mikva”?

      • Avrumy February 25, 2011, 9:46 AM

        Most frum gay guys don’t go to the mikvah much. You can guess why. But it was a nice thought….

        Even better: Saw You at Sauna!

        • Yoreh K'chetz (aka Phil) February 25, 2011, 9:59 AM

          Avrumy,

          So much for that stereotype, I would have thought you guys made it a point to hang around nude dudes.

          I could see myself attending more often if they had co-ed mikvas. Heard they have one in L.A, only it’s a bath-house.

  • Michaltastik February 24, 2011, 8:00 PM

    For me, the shadchans wouldn’t even work with me. Frumster has way more matches under their belt so I take that well. SYAS is for FFBs under 30, not gerim, not older singles. The reason why the men get more matches is because they send everything to the men first.

    • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 9:58 AM

      They actually told you straight up that they wouldn’t work with you? That bluntly?

  • Anonymous February 24, 2011, 11:58 PM

    I disagree with this article. They have to be doing something right if over 1,000 members have gotten married through the site (including myself). There are lots of matchmakers, and each one has their own method of setting people up. (I VOLUNTEER as a matchmaker on the site.) Matchmakers do not get paid and many don’t get any money when I match is made. In order to be matchmaker, you need to commit to a minimum of 10 hours a week working on the site (in addition to any other job or family you have commitments to). The money, I’m assuming, goes to the people who spend their full time job running the site and dealing with “customer service,” technical problems, and matchmaker support. I think your comments here were a little too harsh for a site that is working for many people and getting people married. You might disagree with some of their rules, but it’s a privately owned site and they have a right to make whatever rules they want. And again, it’s working for some people. Maybe it just didn’t work for you.

    • WACKY MAC & CHOCOLATE PIZZA February 27, 2011, 12:35 PM

      There are many towns that offer to pay $2,000 for making a shidduch if the girl lives in that town and is over the age of 23 (official spinster age).

      • Yoreh K'chetz (aka Phil) February 27, 2011, 1:05 PM

        Wacky Mac,

        Do they actually have to get married or just engaged? $2000 is enough to open the door to scammers…

        • BiggestFish February 27, 2011, 9:18 PM

          @Yoreh K’chetz (aka Phil) –
          Let’s start a scam! A few shidduchim and we’ll be rich!!!

      • Andrew December 21, 2014, 5:32 PM

        23 is obviously not old. But I do think it is better for religious girls to start dating at an earlier age because it could take time for girls (or guys) to find the right person. Also, it is harder for older girls to get dates. And some girls realize better what they are and aren’t looking for after they have dated different types of people.

  • WACKY MAC & CHOCOLATE PIZZA February 27, 2011, 12:34 PM

    I met my husband on SYAS.

  • Johnny B'T May 27, 2011, 1:13 PM

    I do like the website SYAS, it seems there are many New Yorkers who are somewhat interesting, however I prefer to go for the out of town girls. I am male, been on the site for 3 months and have 99 matches. However, I have only made it to a second date with one woman, and no third dates. In general, I would say there are many woman, most of them not appropiate to me, and plenty of people who are NOT open minded. Maybe I should stop taking FFB 24 year olds to cafes in Greenich Village on a first date. On the other hand, I like to use that as a metric to how cool they are. If you can’t handle a night out on NY, then we were not meant to be. Any other cool (maybe safer) first date suggestions? There are blind dates after all…

    • Andrew December 21, 2014, 5:40 PM

      Maybe go to a kosher restaurant or a (Jewish or non-Jewish) museum and kosher ice cream store for a first date. Do something normal on a first date, because most girls want to know they are going out with someone normal. Once they feel comfortable with you, you could go to places that are still safe but a bit more exotic.

  • Michael Makovi June 1, 2011, 9:57 AM

    I’ve been on SYAS for a few years now, and I’ve tried half a dozen different matchmakers, and yet I get a match only once every few months. Meh.

  • Mike Sanders September 13, 2011, 11:04 PM

    SYAS is just another part of the International Jewish Womens’ Control All Men Through Nearly Tellepathic Emasculation Commitee. I was a member for a decade. The electronic factor makes it even easier for them. Stay away my brethren. Ish Lreyehu Yomar Chazak.

  • El Gee April 16, 2013, 7:37 PM

    You are definitely NOT cooler than “everyone else out there”

  • Avraham December 18, 2013, 4:23 AM

    Hi,

    Everyone who ever was looking for a shiduch heard about Sawyouatsinai and probably it’s the most popular Shiduchim site.

    Did you hear about http://Shiduch.org site?
    Did you have experience with it, can i trust it?

    Thank you

  • SYAS really does suck May 6, 2014, 8:43 PM

    The website Saw You At Sinai is only good for people who are ultra-orthodox. If you are any other affiliation (modern orthodox liberal, conservative, traditional, or conservadox), you will get barely any matches even if you are a young 20 something living in NYC which is heavily populated by Jews. Do not waste your time! Your matchmakers will search endlessly for you and never send you a match. An alternative like Jdate is a much better option.

  • anonymous December 17, 2014, 6:36 PM

    This guy sounds like a smug, arrogant snob.

  • SYAS_Member August 2, 2015, 1:11 PM

    SYAS
    is NOT a good investment, not even close. I have been on this website on and off for at
    least 2.5 years searching for Ms right.
    There are so many things that make the experience way more difficult
    than what it should be. The level of
    attention one gets from matchmakers varies immensely from one to the other, and
    it is not at all rare to see a matchmaker drop you for whatever reasons. Many matchmakers will not even respond to
    emails sent to them and will ignore you.
    Selecting a matchmaker can be difficult also, because you have to wait
    more often than not a very long time to get accepted into her circle, or it may
    just NOT happen at all. I cant really blame
    the matchmakers in this situation; they are simply not getting paid a pretty
    penny (at least thats my understanding).
    One cant expect proper, and consistent
    service from someone who is doing matchmaking for NO MONEY even if there are
    getting something when a successful match (marriage?) is created.
    Mediocre business model leads to mediocre product.

  • Tom Paste August 2, 2015, 2:39 PM

    SYAS is NOT a good investment, not even close. I have been on this website on and off for at least 2.5 years searching for Ms right. There are so many things that make the experience way more difficult than what it should be. The level of attention one gets from matchmakers varies immensely from one to the other, and it is not at all rare to see a matchmaker drop you for whatever reasons. Many matchmakers will not even respond to emails sent to them and will ignore you. Selecting a matchmaker can be difficult also, because you have to wait more often than not a very long time to get accepted into her circle, or it may just NOT happen at all. I cant really blame the matchmakers in this situation; they are simply not getting paid a pretty penny (at least thats my understanding). One cant expect proper, and CONSISTENT service from someone who is doing matchmaking for NO MONEY even if there are getting something when a successful match (marriage?) is created. Mediocre business model leads to mediocre product.

    • Disappointed_Mensh August 6, 2015, 3:53 PM

      Amen to that. Overall, poor customer service and support, in my experience, which is reflected in the fact that the website has not seen an iota of improvement or innovation (except for the production of an app I think not too long ago) in I dont know how long. This website has some good potential but it is, by in large, mostly unfulfilled what a shame for all those Jewish singles out there.

  • Leah1 October 18, 2015, 4:18 PM

    Ageism. A young lady aquaintance, 25 years old, BT was matched with VERY NICE 37 YEAR OLD, BT. What goes on here? Is she over the hill even for a university type, not looking for a charedi or chassid?
    Nice guy, but 12 year dfference? In the secular world she still is a young chick.

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