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Stuff right wing modern orthodox Jews like

Modern orthodoxy is really such a pain in the neck group to write about these days. Back in the 80’s and early 90’s there was just plain old modern orthodox. The women wore pants and the men played ball on Shabbos – you didn’t see too many seforim lying around the house and the living room was devoted to a big entertainment system with home filmed VHS videos piled on either said. Then kids started flipping out during their year in Israel and the peaceful lives of modern orthodox families were changed forever. I think frumster was the first website to realize the vast differences between left wing and right wing modern orthodox and hence the reason I have to write two posts about what stuff modern orthodox Jews like.

Stuff Right Wing Modern Orthodox Jews Like:

Yeshiva University: If you arent a YU or Stern graduate your chances at achieving the true modern orthodox lifestyle are greatly diminished and your status in Teaneck will be reduced to nothing unless you went to one of the YU safety schools like Maryland, Brandeis, or Binghamton. It also greatly helps your shidduch market value when you need to move back to the Heights to get married.

Yom Haatzmaut: Some say hallel and its one of the greatest holidays for the right wing modern orthodox crowd of course there is debate but show those Stern girls youre frum and dont say tachnun.

Shoulder high mechitzas: If seems like every right wing MO shul in America has a shoulder high mechitza. This allows you to see the women when you stand, but not when you sit so its frum without being too frum.

Rallies: They should have an official schedule of rallies being held, usually about Israel, by RWMO Jews. I used to love rallies because there were always these really cute girls in denim skirts and everyone would have neat signs made out of poster board. Unfortunately the most violent the rallies ever get are when Dov Hikind shows up and starts screaming through a megaphone.

Kumzits: I used to hate it in Camp Moshava when they would do a kumzits, and this was quite often. Everyone would lock arms and we would sway back and forth and sing Acheinu (the modern orthodox national anthem)

Israeli Day Parade: its a big scene you need to go there.

Josh: why does it seem that many modern orthodox kids are named Josh?

Chol Hamoed Amusement parks: Sure the yeshivish crowd likes these things too, but in all seriousness, the Joshs and Ariels of modern orthodoxy, with their tzitzis flying and short denim skirts love the Hershey Park scene. Its talked about in earnest amongst modern kids everywhere.

Carlebach Shabbat: Go to any modern orthodox shul, and chances are that once a month they have a Carlebach Shabbat. This involves three extra songs during kabalas Shabbos and then a half assed attempt at dragging people up for a dance around the bimah. Carlebach Shabbat never extends to the day time, because unless you are a true Shlomo fan you never made it to shacharis and dont know the songs from the daytime.

Trying to sound yeshivish: What is it about modern orthodox folks trying to sound yeshivish? They love trying to use words like dafka, mamish and mimayla, yet they are pronounced with a tzioni accent, and said coherently with the correct amount of syllables. Real yeshivish people make all words into one syllable.

Techeles: It seems like every kid that frummed out in Israel has to have techeles tzitzis. You would never see any normal upstanding yeshivish, or left wing modern orthodox dude wearing blue. Only modern machmir and Bat Ayin types dare to pay $80 for a string of questionable blue.

Quoting the Rav: This is the basis of most right wing modern orthodox thought, so no wonder they like him.

NCSY Advisers: In order to really fit the bill as a member of modern orthodox machmir society, you have to be an NCSY Advisor. You will also likely marry one of your former kids or people with whom you worked.

Goatees: Maybe it has something to do with the Ravs progressive goat beard he had going on, or maybe it has to do with not wanting to be too yeshivish by having a full beard.

Lampshade Hats: If youre a woman and you cover your hair, most likely you are a partial cover upper and you wear a lampshade hat. Baseball hats on women are reserved for kollel wives on vacation.

Khakis: Put on khakis, blue shirt and brown shoes and you have the RWMO outfit that works well during the week or on shabbos. : Lately the dark suit has come into style, but this outfit is a classic.

Learning on the lawn: A modern orthodox suburban favorite — go to your neighbor’s house sit on the lawn and get taught something by someone in your shul.

Other things Right Wing Modern Orthodox People Like:

Fantasy Sports

TV show 24

Yachad

Talking about aliyah

Coed Camps

Frumming Out

College Degrees in Jewish Studies or Talmud

Working in Finance

Havdalah singalongs

Artscroll Gemaras

HASC the hottest girls work at hasc

The year in Israel obsession

New Jersey

Looking neat

Taking forever to sing musaf kedusha

Carrot and humus sticks at kiddush

Things Right Wing Modern Orthodox Jews Dont Like:

Beards: They do goatees, but modern orthodox rabbis dont do the beard thing. I always find sephiras ha-omer a bit odd when they actually do have beards.

Orthoprax: You know those people that are frum, but hide TVs in their closet or lie on their income tax forms? Right wing MO people hate them.

Getting drunk on Purim: I have been in so many MO shuls that dont allow booze on purim. Its really a terrible thing, but I am sure they quote the Rav and tell you why its assur.

Women in tight clothing: right wing modern girls may show their knees and elbows, but unlike really frum women, they dont show their panty line.

Black Hats: Can you truly be modern orthodox if you wear a black hat?

Chabad: I find that left wing modern orthodox Jews love Chabad, but its those more learned, closer to being misnaged right wing MO Jews that find this tension.

Separate seating: One of the last bastions of mixed seating weddings that have separate dancing, the right wing modern orthodox wedding will have a few plants to separate the dance floors, but the seating is all mixed. Good thing modern orthodox people know how to use knives and napkins.

Single sex camps: You cannot possibly be a good modern orthodox machmir kid and have gone to a single sex frummy camp.

Talking in shul: ever notice how quiet the more RWMO shuls are? Left wing modern Jews are very noisy in shul.

Palestine: I have a feeling that the dozens of invites from people on Facebook asking me to join Palestine is not a county are from right wing modern orthodox folks.

Saying Gut Vuch: If you dont say shavua tov people give you strange looks.

Black Velvet Yarmulkes: Another big no-no, you must wear knitted or suede.

Stuff Right Wing Modern Orthodox Jews arent sure if they like:

Gays: Sure YU had a symposium, but it seems like the more left wing crowd likes that sort of thing while the right wing is kind of torn.

Sheitles: In recent years more and more modern orthodox women have been putting on sheitles, hence the reason for this split between left and right wing modern orthodox. When I was a kid NO modern orthodox woman would be caught dead in a sheitle, let alone cover her hair during the week.

Shomer Negiah: From a young age modern orthodox kids talk about negiah. As soon as they hit marriageable age it’s no longer mentioned. It seems that most people say they are, but in right wing MO circles, its hush-hush. This lasts until youre in a relationship at which point people are shomer in public. Left wing MO are not shomer in public.

Shabbos/Shabbat: for MO Jews this is a struggle and I think more and more RWMO Jews are calling it shabbos to the disdain of their parents. I generally profile people when it comes to saying good shabbos or shabbat shalom – it all depends on their look.

Halakha or Halacha: Only in the MO world do the shul bulletins use the KH as a CH, and it seems to be different everywhere.

Womens rights: On the one hand its a good thing to have Yoetzet Halacha and more womens participation, but on the other hand we are right wing now and need to uphold tradition. But who goes to the YU womens graduate program in Talmud?

Coed yeshivas: Hence the reason for coed and single sex yeshivas. It seems that the kids from coed yeshivas end up way more religious than the kids from single sex yeshivas. For instance Frisch vs. TABC.

Women in Pants: this is one of those things that the RWMO are iffy on. It seems like pants are ok for sports, but all other times you have to wear a knee length skirt.

By the wayright wing modern orthodox has two other terms to describe it. Modern Orthodox Machmir or modern ORTHODOX.

{ 89 comments… add one }
  • Q April 15, 2010, 12:35 PM

    Hesh, your “Stuff… ____ Jews like” has been some of your best work.

    Things RWMO don’t like: repeating words by the Chazzan anywhere, but especially in Chazaras Hashatz. Chasidim are fine with it (all the traditional chazzanim do it, and many Chasidim love chazzanus), but the Rav forbade it.

  • Anonymous April 15, 2010, 12:44 PM

    RW MO don’t go to co-ed camps.

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 2:42 PM

      Dude the RWMO have their own camps – Moshava and Morasha specifically – the left wing MO go to Massad, Hillil and Mesorah

      • Josh (typical huh) April 15, 2010, 2:59 PM

        Moshava is a co-ed Bnei Akiva camp. It’s not RW , although many of the campers who end up making aliyah because of the Moshava brainwashing end up RWMO in Israel.

        Morasha is a boys camp and a girls camp that happen to share separate ends of a dining hall. I’m sure the counselors flirt with each other after hours, but it can’t really be called a mixed camp.

        • tikunolam April 15, 2010, 6:09 PM

          Now I am confused. I went to Moshava with R’ Avi Weiss’ son 😉

      • tikunolam April 15, 2010, 3:40 PM

        When did Mesorah go LW?? Disagree on few here. Pants are LW only. Sheitals are everywhere. What about Penn, Columbia/Barnard, too feminist?

        • Aaron May 9, 2010, 9:23 PM

          Mesorah is not left wing.

          • Mike January 16, 2013, 7:44 PM

            Agreed – terrible call
            Mesorah is classic RWMO – but then ago so are the left wing yeshivish camps that turned 99% RWMO like Dora Golding
            Left Wing is SENICA, MOSAD, and sometimes MONROE

  • NonymousG April 15, 2010, 12:45 PM

    Agreed, best series yet I think! It does bother me through when people say they’re Orthodox yet open flout Halacha, such as not covering hair, or not being Shomer Negiah.

    • Levy Bernstein April 15, 2010, 12:54 PM

      I was in a home once for a meal and one of the women said, “Would anyone mind if I take off my head covering?” Before I could say anything, another one of the women said, “I’m so glad you asked, I’m dying to take this off!” and all of the women uncovered their hair. There was definitely no Sota water being served at this meal, either. 🙂

    • Mark April 15, 2010, 1:37 PM

      … or such as cheating the government for money for their yeshiva, or cheating on their taxes, or using illegal hiring practices.

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 2:43 PM

      If you’re going to mention touting halacha you should mention things that everyone agrees to be true halacha – like getting a bris milah or killing amalek. You picked to things that have a lot of debate within scholarly circles.

      • NonymousG April 15, 2010, 5:07 PM

        I didn’t mention those because they are not up for discussion halacha-wise. I highly doubt that every Jewess who is MO and doesn’t cover their hair is the specific strain of Sefard that doesn’t keep it. R’ Hirsch founded MO with the intention of showing we could maintain Halacha and adapt to modernity, to fight the Reform. I don’t have a problem with people who don’t keep halacha – only people who claim to be Orthodox but don’t recognise they are flouting halachos. Sorry Hesh, I like you a lot, but Shulchan Aruch et al don’t agree that there is “a lot of debate within scholarly circles.”

        No serious Ashkenazi posek would agree either.

        • Xvi April 15, 2010, 6:34 PM

          I think it bears mentioning that when you say “not up for discussion” you mean not open for discussion by the powers that be. Im not looking to seem all teenage-rebellion F-the-man or anything, but these gedolim have been playing by their own rules for quite some time now and things that are accepted or not accepted these days are pretty much determined by the same 5 people. Thats been true for a few hundred years now (obviously not the SAME 5 people). The idea basically is a “my way or the highway” attitude from whats commonly accepted to be the da’as torah. That dosent make it the final word in halac(k?)ha. It just makes it THEIR final word.

          Now thats not to say that everyone can pick or choose what they will or wont keep, but it dosent either invalidate the opinion of someone who is knowledgeable and learned but dosent share in the group-think of what orthodoxy has become since the haskala, and more recently since the holocaust.

          And while Im not exactly comparing the halachic requirement for women to not wear pants to the current minhag of the black fedora, I’m not saying they AREN’T similar either.

          • Yevreyechka April 16, 2010, 12:52 PM

            True, a lot of the accepted Torah lifestyle today is very different from the way it was originally, back in Ancient Israel. That is a natural consequence of 2000 year exile. You say ” things that are accepted or not accepted these days are pretty much determined by the same 5 people” and you are right. It is especially frustrating if you don’t get those people (I don’t). But how crazy would it be if we had 300 people determining these issues? A lot of our practices today are very questionable, and I question them all the time. But, I also understand that if we want to remain one nation, we have to have one religion. As individuals, we should think and analyze, but practically, we have to conform to the accepted religious standards, just for the sake of unity of Judaism.

          • Yevreyechka April 16, 2010, 3:12 PM

            True, a lot of the accepted Torah lifestyle today is very different from the way it was originally, back in Ancient Israel. That is a natural consequence of 2000 year exile. You say ” things that are accepted or not accepted these days are pretty much determined by the same 5 people” and you are right. It is especially frustrating if you don’t get those people (I don’t). But how crazy would it be if we had 300 people determining these issues? A lot of our practices today are very questionable, and I question them all the time, and I get upset about them. But, I also understand that if we want to remain one nation, we have to have one religion. As individuals, we should think and analyze, but practically, we have to conform to the accepted religious standards, just for the sake of unity of Judaism.

        • Noni April 16, 2010, 12:33 AM

          Sorry, if you look at the actual development of the halacha, there’s quite a lot of debate about what HEAD covering actually means (it’s called kisui rosh not kisui s’ear). The Rambam ruled that all girls from age three should cover their hair because… that’s what his Muslim neighbors did. Ashkenaz had the minhag that only married women cover their head in the marketplace. It’s also unclear what “paruah” the actual word used in the sotah story means but “uncovered” is not the automatic translation. It could mean wild, it could mean unbraided.

          I consider Rabbi Saul Berman to be a serious orthodox scholar and I learned the sources with him in Stern.

  • Q April 15, 2010, 12:48 PM

    I think the term “Shomer Negiah” was coined in RWMO circles (NCSY, probably). In all my years at a non-modern yeshiva in Brooklyn (where college was permitted but strongly discouraged), I never heard the phrase once.

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 2:43 PM

      I never heard the term either – but that was because in yeshiva you aren’t even allowed to talk to girls and so it doesn’t come up.

      • tikunolam April 17, 2010, 3:31 PM

        I grew up with Shomer Negiah. Was definitely an NCSY or centrist MO on their way to RW MO thing.

    • rwrw April 15, 2010, 8:50 PM

      That’s because there is no such term in Halacha. Either you flirt or you don’t. Negiah is just one way to flirt. See Even Ha’ezer 21

    • old fashioned modern ortho April 15, 2010, 9:53 PM

      My 11 year old uses the term all of the time. Usually it is just “shomer”. She attends a MO Yeshivah, mixed school seperate classes. She is also worried about kol isha, the sell out.

  • E. April 15, 2010, 1:04 PM

    Can’t wait for ‘The Stuff left wing modern orthodox Jews like.”

  • Realistically Religious April 15, 2010, 1:15 PM

    This article confirms that you are a biased hypocritical self hating Orthodox Jew. Your satire is just a farce. The fact that you actually pass yourself off as a comedian is comical itself. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder. You seem to be a lot more malicious towards the Modern Orthodox and defensive if not sympathetic towards the Yeshivish/Charedi element. Hell, I even suspect that you have a modicum of respect towards Hockers compared to the article your wrote about the MO. What is your problem? You happen to be tenuous on religious matters so don’t you go criticizing those for not living up to the Torah standards. It amuses me how you pass yourself as an out of towner. Are you ashamed about the fact that you from Monsey? You are as much as a New Yorker as anyone else can get so swallow your pride and grow up!!!

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 2:46 PM

      Wow – I can’t wait until you read the charedi one – it’s way more malicious then this one – including the part where I say they like protecting molestors.

      I’m not from Monsey dude – I grew up in Manhattan. I’m not ashamed to be a New Yorker – I live in San Francisco but still have my New York plates – that’s pride.

      G-d willing I will never grow up – and you do realize I am modern orthodox right?

    • Ezra R April 15, 2010, 3:11 PM

      not so funny when hes making fun of you, eh? I didn’t hear you bitching when he was making fun of the charedis. Don’t be so sensitive little man.

      • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 3:19 PM

        I love how people love this site until I touch a nerve by making fun of who they are. Exactly as you said Ezra – they only notice when it hurts them – no when it pokes fun at anyone else.

        I did enjoy the comment because so many of the critics say I make fun of frummies too much.

        • Moi April 15, 2010, 6:50 PM

          People only find humor in the embellishment of other peoples lives. Ask a right-winger what they think of Jon Stewart, and see what kind of response you get. Ask a left-winger what they think of Dennis Miller and see what kind of response you get.
          The fact that you hit a nerve only confirms that your assessment of the RWMO is fairly accurate.

          • Anonymous April 17, 2010, 2:52 AM

            I think it is hilarious! I hope he does me next lol

  • Thomas Anderson April 15, 2010, 1:29 PM

    “Orthoprax: You know those people that are frum, but hide TVs in their closet or lie on their income tax forms? Right wing MO people hate them.”

    Orthoprax generally means people who question/doubt many of the fundamental articles of faith like Torah M’Sinai, but still keep orthodox halachic standards.

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 3:21 PM

      Orthoorax also means those who look to be keeping strict halachic standards but aren’t – we used to call them fakers.

      I think everyone I know besides for my BT and convert friends is orthoprax

      • tikunolam April 17, 2010, 3:34 PM

        Heshy, I don’t know how the term Orthoprax started, but it is not used on the web word the way you describe. Thomas had it right.

        The others are still fakers, or OJ affiliated.

    • Anonymous July 5, 2019, 4:17 AM

      I guess it’s the old time query between doing stuff vs believing stuff; which is more important? Action v faith? Agreed you need to have a combination…

  • Ezrie April 15, 2010, 1:37 PM

    “Women in tight clothing: right wing modern girls may show their knees and elbows, but unlike really frum women, they dont show their panty line.”

    This is the exact difference between MO and Chabad. Everything else is “learned out” from this. Hit the nail on the head!

    Also, something else MO’s like (especially me): Saying “where are we holding” when asking about anything else BUT gemara.

    • Phil April 15, 2010, 3:16 PM

      I thought it’s because they didn’t wear panties 😉

  • Yochanan April 15, 2010, 1:41 PM
  • QUEENS COLLEGE April 15, 2010, 1:42 PM

    ” If you arent a YU or Stern graduate your chances at achieving the true modern orthodox lifestyle are greatly diminished and your status in Teaneck will be reduced to nothing unless you went to one of the YU
    safety schools like Maryland, Brandeis, or Binghamton”

    I would have to disagree slightly Queens college is The hom of modox jews Right and left wing

    • Aaron May 9, 2010, 9:32 PM

      Maryland and Brandeis, okay. Binghamtom is definitely not a RWMO YU safety school. And Maryland and Brandeis are not safety schools, just suitable alternatives.

  • RWMO Girl April 15, 2010, 1:48 PM

    I fall into this category, and found this post hilarious and mostly true.

    Although I agree that we hate Women in tight clothing,” I disagree that “right wing modern girls may show their knees and elbows.” True “Modern Orthodox Machmir” or RWMO women DO cover their knees and elbows.

    Overall, great post, very entertaining.

    • tesyaa April 15, 2010, 2:17 PM

      True Modern Orthodox Machmir or RWMO women DO cover their knees and elbows.

      Except when they don’t.

    • Anonymous April 15, 2010, 6:00 PM

      Yeah, jeans typically go past the knees.

  • anon April 15, 2010, 2:19 PM

    no its MODERN orthodox or modern ORTHODOX, its all about where you put it. and btw now a days Brooklyn College, Queens College, NYU and even Touro get more really frum moderns than say the way Bing and Albany used to

  • SkepticButJewish April 15, 2010, 2:37 PM

    Another thing that both left wing and right wing modern orthodox Jews like is how they pretend they are so different from the Orthodox or Ultra-Orthodox Jews. They pretend that they are more in line with science than the Orthodox Jews but in reality are just as anti-science.

    • Q April 15, 2010, 3:17 PM

      It’s true that when it comes down to fundamental Jewish beliefs (like Torah mi’Sinai), there’s very little difference between the RWMO and Ultra-Orthodox. I was speaking to a RWMO person about biblical criticism, and he referred me to the Rav’s book “The Lonely Man of Faith,” where he wrote: “I have not even been troubled by the theories of Biblical criticism which contradict the very foundations upon which the sanctity and integrity of the Scriptures rest.” He didn’t give a reason why he wasn’t troubled by it, so that RWMO person, in ignoring biblical criticism, is putting blind faith in the Rav just as a Chasid does in his Rebbe.

      My name for right-wing modern orthodoxy is “Artscroll Judaism.”

      • NonymousG April 15, 2010, 5:02 PM

        “My name for right-wing modern orthodoxy is Artscroll Judaism.

        I am writing that one down!

        • Sergey Kadinsky April 15, 2010, 11:29 PM

          So, what’s traditional non-haredi Orthodoxy then? “Hertz-Birnbaum Judaism?”

      • Tova April 16, 2010, 4:54 PM

        Nicely put, Q. But are you sure about your “ArtScroll” comment? Most MO people I know – left- or right-wing – can’t stand ArtScroll.

        • John April 16, 2010, 6:26 PM

          Is that the truth, or are you lying again?

          • ghottistyx April 16, 2010, 9:37 PM

            Believe it or not, plenty of them don’t. The more scholarly ones I know will take the JPS translation of Artscroll, they consider it more accurate. And yes, Serge, I’m of the Birnbaum/Hertz generation.

            Also, there’s Aryeh Kaplan’s “The Living Torah,” which I happen to be a fan of. Here’s another interesting article, what MO Jews think of Aryeh Kaplan. I used to be a huge fan of his. He has a way of being able to explain concepts of both Kaballah and Hard Science in a manner that’s comprehensible to people who are versed in neither. His affiliation with NCSY (and the many books he’s written for them) may be slightly off-putting to a more right wing crowd; I’ve never investigated.

            One thing I remember liking about “The Living Torah” is the section in Parashat Noach where they speak of the 70 nations (i.e. people who existed in the world during the Dor HaHaphlaga). Aryeh Kaplan actually speculates what current nations may have descended from these 70 nations. For example, “Magog” may have been Mongolia (based on some people having called The Great Wall of China “The Wall of Magog”), and thus speculating that Gog and Magog may be from that part of the world.

        • Q April 19, 2010, 1:19 PM

          I disagree. Artscroll has become standard in most Young Israels that I’ve attended. The shul I daven at isn’t a Young Israel, but the rav is YU-trained. He’s made a big push to make Artscroll siddurim and chumashim standard, and the Artscroll Talmud is threatening to push all other sefarim out of the library.

          Artscroll completely ignores the fact that knowledge and scholarship have progressed over the centuries. We know more today about philology and ancient history than Rashi did, but Artscroll would treat that idea as heresy. Artscroll is a big step backwards from Soncino.

          • Tova April 19, 2010, 4:37 PM

            “Artscroll completely ignores the fact that knowledge and scholarship have progressed over the centuries…Artscroll is a big step backwards from Soncino.”

            Exactly. This is why most MO people I know dislike (even detest) ArtScroll. Now, the MO people that you know may be different people. My MO friends prefer publishers other than ArtScroll, and lots of MO shuls and schools are switching to the KSS siddur from ArtScroll.

    • Bubba Metzia April 15, 2010, 9:22 PM

      How are they anti-science? Have you read any books by Natan Slifkin?

      • SkepticButJewish April 16, 2010, 10:30 AM

        So you believe there is no Adam and Eve story? (Assuming you accept the theory of evolution).

        Also, you still believe in life after death despite all the evidence that is again it. Everything we know in neuroscience would contradict this religious view.

        • Bubba Metzia April 16, 2010, 1:08 PM

          The Rambam stated that if there is a conflict between science and Torah then either the science is wrong or your interpretation of Torah is wrong. You should read The Challenge of Creation by Natan Slifkin. It has many good arguments that reconcile evolution with the Torah.

          As for the life after death thing, I don’t see how neuroscience would negate that. Just because the physical world might affect people doesn’t negate the existence of the soul.

          • chevramaidel April 17, 2010, 10:54 PM

            “The Rambam stated that if there is a conflict between science and Torah then either the science is wrong or your interpretation of Torah is wrong.” I love that and would like to be able to quote it. Do you have a source to back it up with?

            • Bubba Metzia April 22, 2010, 6:20 PM

              It’s in The Guide for the Perplexed, Book II, chapter 25. He talks about why reject Aristotle’s theory of an eternal universe is rejected because there is no proof. But if by some chance Aristotle was proven correct that would not negate Torah and Torah would be reinterpreted accordingly.

  • heshmiseter April 15, 2010, 2:43 PM
  • Phil April 15, 2010, 3:18 PM

    Man, a lot of this stuff is accurate. My M.O fishing buddy chewed me out for going fishing instead of attending the Israel day parade a couple years ago. He also has a son named Josh.

    • Heshy Fried April 15, 2010, 3:22 PM

      I think Josh sounds Jewish because it’s always Joshua

      • Yochanan April 17, 2010, 9:59 PM

        So what,

        Jake sounds Jewish because it’s always Jacob.

        Mike sounds Jewish because it’s always Michael.

  • Xvi April 15, 2010, 3:25 PM

    I think the ‘no talking in shul’ thing is more community-dependent than you let on. At least my experience would imply that. Have you been to any of the Young Israels in the Queens area. I’d be shocked if even half of the shul would be quiet at any given time.

  • Anon April 15, 2010, 3:31 PM

    Another thing they like:
    Women being barefoot.
    It seems like in the RWMO crowd, not only do women show their knees and elbows, but a lot of them are barefoot if the temperature breaks 70.
    A lot of them will take their shoes off after kiddush and hamotzie and then put them back on for bircat hamazon. They even do it as some of the cleaner kosher restuarants.

    • Phil April 15, 2010, 4:39 PM

      Anon,

      Sound like redneck m.o.’s too me.

      Then again, I usually take off my shirt at the Shabbos table when the AC isn’t cooling enough or I’ve had too many tequilas / hot peppers, and I’m no m.o.

  • Akiva April 15, 2010, 4:41 PM

    LOVE IT!

  • Maybe MO? April 15, 2010, 5:06 PM

    LOL! Heshy I love the whole series, but this one the most since I identify with it. That is I thought I identified with it but according to the do’s and don’t apparently I’m a 1/3 yeshivaish, 1/3 RWMO and 1/3 LWMO — then again I guess that still averages out to RWMO 🙂

    I guess MO in Baltimore is all mixed up

  • The Real Joe April 15, 2010, 6:22 PM

    I love this whole series even the one that hit chabad which I am a member off I am not stupid I understand that in order to be liget you need to put the pro’s a cons in each piece talking about Carlbach shuls the one in Tzfas {Beriev} turns into 770 every motzi Shabbos

  • abandoning eden April 15, 2010, 7:40 PM

    You forgot the safety schools Barnard and Upenn for the smart RWMOs.

    In my day, six flags great adventures was where it was at on chol hamoaid

    • tikunolam April 17, 2010, 3:37 PM

      AE,
      I said the same thing!

  • Anonymous April 15, 2010, 9:51 PM
  • Woodrow/Conservadox April 15, 2010, 11:01 PM

    I laughed harder at this one than at any of the others- kind of ironic since I’ve probably had less experience with RWMO than with non-O, LWMO, Chabad or Yeshivish.

  • Waldo April 15, 2010, 11:15 PM

    Overall good list, but there are several things here the real yeshivish-yu types (basically the most right wing of MO) would not go near. Maybe there should be three categories: LWMO, middle MO, and RWMO

  • ishchayill April 15, 2010, 11:26 PM

    Looking forward to the LWMO version.

  • a reader April 16, 2010, 12:31 AM

    More SRWMOL:

    Hirhurim

    Joe Lieberman

    SOY book sale

    Rabbi Slifkin

    Hirhurim

    Zemanim

  • Yochanan April 16, 2010, 7:10 AM

    There are many Orthodox Jews who shave, but why does it seem that only Modern Orthodox rabbis have baby-smooth faces?

    Is it that RW Modern Orthodox Jews don’t follow Shmirat Negi’a, or do they simply interpret it differently (handshake OK, but don’t go past it, etc.)

  • Tova April 16, 2010, 4:33 PM

    Finally, a post explaining my upbringing (somewhat)!

    Other things RWMO people like:

    Rav Kahane
    Hesder yeshivot
    Non-Chalav Yisrael products

    Good Shabbos…

  • ghottistyx April 16, 2010, 9:40 PM

    YU needs a safety school? Don’t make me laugh. I got into YU and I got into an argument with the man who interviewed me. Basically, if you are Jewish and you’ve been circumcised, you’re in!

    • Heshy Fried April 18, 2010, 1:45 AM

      My brother graduated from MTA and was rejected from YU

      • Mark April 18, 2010, 10:31 AM

        I wonder if they sometimes (in borderline cases) base their admission decision on ability to pay full tuition?

  • Izzy April 17, 2010, 11:43 PM

    What about:

    R’ Aharon Lichtenstein
    R’ Hershel Shechter
    Gruss
    Daat Torah (the article, not the concept)

  • Dave April 18, 2010, 1:29 AM

    As a person who went to a “YU Feeder School” who now attends Binghamton, I would have to disagree that Binghamton is the ideal YU safety school.

  • DS April 18, 2010, 1:36 AM

    Whoever wrote this forgot to proof read it. There are so many spelling mistakes, it is simply unbelievable.

    There’s something a Modern Orthodox Jew doesn’t like: poor spelling and grammar. Didn’t YU teach you that at the very least?

    • Heshy Fried April 18, 2010, 1:47 AM

      You remind me of the old days when the only critical comments were those from folks who needed to tell me I couldn’t spell – I went to yeshiva they taught us about wasting seed, but nothing of spelling.

      • DS April 18, 2010, 2:07 AM

        Glad to provide you with nostalgia, at the very least.

      • Bigbadmoish April 18, 2010, 7:39 AM

        Heshy, so I guess you learnt nothing in yeshiva then

        • Heshy Fried May 12, 2011, 1:01 AM

          I learned how to hide porn in cereal boxes, which would be pretty cool if not for the fact that internet porn has taken over.

  • JF April 20, 2010, 2:50 PM

    The best item on this list, hands down, is “taking forever to sing musaf kedusha.” Hilarious.

  • anonymous April 23, 2010, 11:00 PM

    dont forget: College Jewish a-capella groups!

  • Ben May 12, 2011, 11:47 AM

    Machmir is More-thodox.

  • crocs ? September 6, 2013, 11:37 PM

    ??? ??

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