I think I may have to do short lists for every holiday, because messing with BT’s rocks and makes the time go by quicker.Check out the original Messing with BT’s and the Rosh Hashana/YK/Succos edition
Messing with Baal Teshuvas on Yom Kippur:
Tell them that their shoes looking like leather is a major ayin harah;
Tell them that we bend down durring viduy because clopping our chests is untznius;
Tell them that BT’s are only not allowed to bid for aliyahs, only for things like pesicha and gelila;
Ask them if the checked their brand of non-leather shoes against the rabbinically approved list, because some plastics contain leather derivatives;
Tell them that similar to not looking at chometz on Pesach they cannot look at food on Yom Kippur;
Tell them its assur to go to the bathroom during musaf;
Tell them that since they are newly keeping halacha they must make a taanis dibbur;
Tell them that the people who go shoeless are the holiest in shul;
Tell them that they must clop until it hurts – and then run back and tell them they can’t make a bruise on Yom Kippur;
If you see a BT getting called to the torah, steal the bracha sheet;
Tell them that transliterated siddurs are not allowed to be used on Yom Kippur because people who don’t keep shabbos tend to favor them;
Tell them that they must bury the napkins used for aleinu with shamos;
Tell them that their viduy clopping must be skin on skin;
Tell them that Birnbaum machzors are assur because they use old English;
Tell them that it’s a zechus to bid $613 for an aliyah;
Convince them that going to the bathroom is assur on Yom Kippur because it is pleasurable;
Tell them that after Yom Kippur they should check if they have a black and blue mark where they beat their chest to make sure they did proper teshuvah;
Tell them that before going to the mikvah they must think of one specific sin and dip each time that sin was committed;
Tell them that looking at women is assur on Yom Kippur including their wives;
Any to add to the list?
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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
bowing for alaynu without pants
no bathroom during kol nidre or beforehand
Tell them we keep two days CHutz LaAretz.
i wanted to “like button” this so badly.
Ruthie, only YOU would make that comment, assuming this is the Ruth that I know.
And yes, I’ve had the desire to like button things on Twitter, only to find out that I couldn’t. This is a great annoyance.
And yes, this is a great idea to tell BTs.
I cannot believe I just ran into the two of you here. Odama, I’m shocked. No
?
Ah, never mind, just weird emoticons. Argh. Well, Chag Sameach, you two!
adam!!
i don’t have Twitter
When is Heshy going to learn to spell?
When I can afford grad school – or get a full time editor – if you want edited posts read my regular articles on Jewcy.com
You could tell them about some of the things I know that machmir people have done:
Tell them to stand during all of davening.
Tell them sleeping on Yom kippur is forbidden, and must be replaced with tehillim reading.
Tell them its ossur to sleep during the Rabbi’s speech
Mean and dumb….
This article is “cute” and amusing in its way but you might want to consider that on Yom Kippur EVERYONE in shul is there to be a baal teshuva (if you’re not, why bother showing up at all?) in which case you’re as much a potential candidate for ribbing as the year around Baalei Teshuva you appear to be “playing with” here.
while I myself am FFB from a family full of Rabbis I am reminded of my grandfather Z”L’s disgust with the contempt so many in the FFB world have for people who (even if through ignorance they go overboard to the extreme at times) are essentially people trying to better themselves and who need to be taught not ridiculed. Yes we all find some of the extremism risible at times – but it generally comes from genuinely good intentions misdirected and that doesn’t mean it’s right to be laughing at them. Remember that Baalei teshuva can reach heights of spirituality that many FFB Tzadikim can’t hope to attain.
While I enjoy many of your pieces and think you have a good sense of humor I think you overstepped yourself here considering the timing and subject matter. Just one man’s opinion