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I may be the most immature person I know

Two thinsg happened on shabbos that made me crack up, I think I was the only one that thought they were funny, so funny in fact that I had to hold my face down and stop myself from bursting.

One the daughters of my hosts was showing of her Aleph-Beis book that she made – when suddenly she said that Beis is for Balls!!! It was tough to hold it in.

Then we were learning some pirkei avos and it was about not giving in to insults. The hostsess said that her kallah teacher told her that sometimes you just have to swallow…but, then like that one time I went out with a frummy girl that kept using the term fisting, she said it over andf over again. Finally it was reiterated that it was about swallowing your pride, not other things.

Is it just me or am I really immature?

{ 23 comments… add one }
  • Jered July 13, 2009, 2:43 PM

    What did the frummy girl mean by fisting?

  • Aviva July 13, 2009, 2:45 PM

    Your immaturity is half the reason I read the blog, Heshy! Keep on keepin’ on, baby!

  • Frum Satire July 13, 2009, 2:49 PM

    Thank you Aviva

  • Elazar July 13, 2009, 2:50 PM

    If all she said is “soemtimes you just have to swallow,” and not even “swallow it” or “swallow your pride,” I think you’re good.

    But if she added those extra “it” or “pride” pieces, yeah, I think it’s a bit immature.

  • josh July 13, 2009, 2:58 PM

    pathetic excuse of a life of boredom u call a blog..

    i have to be a critic of ur blog u dont seem to have to many…and oh yea..ur videos of jewish crap, suck..very old school ametur crap..not funny at all..u should dig a hold go in and cover it..

  • Frum Satire July 13, 2009, 3:06 PM

    Elazer there may have been an “it” in there – I was busy trying to hold in my laughter

  • Vagabond July 13, 2009, 3:09 PM

    Haha. very funny. I’m cracking up just imagining the the moment she mentions ” my kallah teacher says u need to swallow” hilarious. And Josh, that’s some good movie writing quality.

  • Frum Satire July 13, 2009, 3:20 PM

    Josh – why can’t you critics do something besides curse me out – I really wish I had some intelligent critics.

  • Schwartzie July 13, 2009, 4:41 PM

    One time I was at a well-known Jewish musician’s house for shabbos (a real frummy) and his three year old kid comes over and starts pulling on my sleeve like to tell me something, and everyone at the table is looking at us, and I look over at the kid, and he just lets out this huge fart, and I started laughing, and then looked back up at the table and everyone was staring at me in silence.

    Your website swallows like the most wicked kallah, you should go to blog school to learn how to blog, but you can’t get in because they don’t take Jews, especially not idiot ones like you. Also, I said something perverted to Yechiel today about the little children he volunteers with and he said I was immature. Goodbye.

  • Devorah July 13, 2009, 7:23 PM

    Critics are just failed bloggers.

  • afloydchick July 13, 2009, 8:00 PM

    the swallow one was def funny! i prolly would have made some kind of joke or just repeat it , like oh yea, you have to swallow sometimes?

  • balebusta July 13, 2009, 9:35 PM

    I would have been cracking up the whole time….totally not just you…although perhaps that just means I’m immature too

  • Jenna July 13, 2009, 9:44 PM

    Is it bad that I’m usually the only one giggling at the dinner table, too?

    I’d probably be dying if I heard some girl talking about fisting.

    The worst part is being around girls who are so sweet and innocent, only to realize that you truly ARE the only one that can find the innuendo in all the things they are saying.

    Truly immature. 🙂

  • eyekanspel July 14, 2009, 4:00 AM

    You can find innuendo in anything. Even in the word innuendo.

    It’s not immature if you notice the innuendo in everything. It’s only immature if you can’t control your laughter and make everyone think you’re a freak and a total pervert. Hmmm… I guess you ARE immature.
    Love ya, Hesh 😀

    Oh, and you critics can go shove a baton up innuendo.

  • ConservativeSci Fi July 14, 2009, 6:37 AM

    The reason you don’t have any intelligent critics is that the intelligent people appreciate your humor for its lighthearted and loving jabs at our shared culture.

  • Frum Satire July 14, 2009, 9:16 AM

    Thank you conservative – I was thinking that, but there are still intelligent people that could bash me, they used to come around more often

  • judefolly July 14, 2009, 8:33 PM

    your observations are a scream

  • judefolly July 15, 2009, 3:15 AM

    one other thing, hesh, pay no attention to the nay-sayers, grammar goons an’ half-wit hacks. you’ve produced some exceptionally amusing and nuanced content about the frum universe.

  • Phil July 18, 2009, 11:07 PM

    Your post reminds me of Beavis and Butthead. Very immature yet very funny.

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