I searched frantically for something to read during laining, I went to the library on the side of the shul and all I could find were two stone chumashim. There were no English mussar texts, no stories about people gaining riches through tzedaka, and certainly no random emails from random shuls in Monsey that charge you $36 a year for your shul subscription (those emails cost more then most magazine subscriptions)
I was really disappointed actually and felt the need to display my anger to a friend in the hall, he said I was a dumbass because upstairs there was a whole English Library, but then someone else butted in and told me it was closed. What kind of baal teshuva yeshiva is this?
I thought to myself as I went back in to laining. I know Shar Yashuv isn’t what it used to be, mostly based on old timers stories and descriptions I can tell its nothing like it used to be, in fact it became exactly what they didn’t want it to be. Just a run of the mill large yeshiva of penguins.
My friend told me one story of how Rav Shlomo Freifeld zt”l went up to Woodstock in 1969 and talked torah with kids on the way to the festivities, that would never happen nowadays, instead they would probably curse everyone and start a riot or something. My old man knew Rav Shlomo from Chaim Berlin and told me he was one funny dude.
One of the few people I idolize went to Shar Yashuv back in the day and I asked him and his friends what they think of the current yeshiva, to which they responded “no comment, that’s a sore subject” which means the obvious.
The sanctuary or shul for you frummies, of shar yashuv is beautiful , the only problem is that their mechitza engineer designed the place so you never see the women. In fact I have no idea if there were any women there because you can’t even see where they come in or leave from, it was as if they beamed them up through a portal or something – but like most yeshivas I expect that. Apparently the only time they open the mechitza a drop, is durring simchas torah, when the women “go shopping” can the men go shopping too?
About half way through davening a cousin of mine invited me out to what I can only call a poor mans ghetto kiddush club in the dorm. I ate broken garlic tam tams and two kinds of herrings while my cousin and his yeshiva buddies boozed it up. We missed the haftorah, benching rosh chodesh, the rabbis speech and musaf = good kiddush club.
Shar Yashuv does have something interesting that I would advocate all shuls to acquire or train. They have an official “shusher” to run up to you and tell you to be quiet if you talk during shul. So for instance my dad had to tell me that he noticed at my stepsisters graduation from Tag that her class “didn’t have no beauties” and repeat it multiple times to make sure he could tell me that he was becoming a dirty old man, I’m so proud of my dad.
Anyway, out of nowhere comes this man with a white beard and his finger placed neatly on his laps while he reassuringly pats me on the shoulder in a friendly way.
I got to talking with him after shul to congratulate him on being the first shul talker shusher that doesn’t embarrass people in public or stop the entire davening to quiet the shul and is very effective. Apparently he was appointed by Rav Shlomo himself, I wonder what his salary is.
The only reason I walked the long haul to shar yashuv, besides to check out the non-existent ladies section, was because the person I was eating at is the announcement guy at Shar Yashuv, huge would be understatement , this man is almost 7 feet tall. He told me he stopped telling people he’s a fan of Frum Satire because he wants his daughters to get shidduchim, it all comes back to shidduchim.
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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
You read this sh1t, its a one way ticket to he’ll…
Did your stepssiter graduate 8th or 12th grade?
Sounds like a “Booming” sorta fellow.
That’s a nice pun david. It took me a second to remember that that’s his name.
The only reason his daughter might have troubles find a shidduch, is because she’s as tall as her father!
Their is normally a better kiddush club in the kitchen of the dinning hall! plus you get to see all of the women because their is a glass doorway their leading to the womens enterance.
Also, Stand or sit by the aron kodesh durring simchat torah and/or Purim for a good view of the women while they’re shopping. (There is not much to look at!)
Speak to Rabbi Greene if you want the english library opened. If bochurim want to take a book out of the library, they have to check it out (kinda similar to a real library!).
They keep it closed on shabbos so random kehillah members don’t walk off with books.
Ohh, Religiousperv is right, Stand by the aron kodesh on simchas torah if you want to go shopping!
If you know the Rosen family in Far Rockaway give a shout out to Mordechai
Sorry – I don’t think the women behind the mechitza would have any interest in you. I assume that your looking for women during davening is because you prefer that to tefila. They probably have some women for you to stare at at Temple Emanuel on 5th Ave and of course there’s no mechitza there. Also the majority of the women are probably not halachicly Jewish anyway.
…plus I’m sure the minyan at YM’s place is more inspiring anyways…
RE: Yiddishe Maidel
It’s actually an ezras nashim, many of the girls their are easy (i know from experience) And if you were paying attention, the post was talking about, while everyone was dancing around, during Simchas Torah.. Not while davening!
And yes… personally, I would choose to look at women, rather than daven with kavanah.
Thanks for the sugestion! I might look into Temple Emanuel! *mwahh!
Firstly, who the hell are you to rip on a kidduch club that you didnt have to pay for and were invited to as a guest. Dont you think thats sort of ungrateful. Also, Shar Yoshuv is a great yeshiva which does a lot of amazing things instead of judging maybe try going there for a few days and see whats really going on. talk to the rebbaim, and the guys who really enjoy it there and have grown. Also its one hudred percent not a black and white yeshiva. there are polos, t shirts, jeans etc. Dont be suck a prick, try saying something nice for once!
Looking for yeshivish?
‘not brisker yeshivish’
Heshy, that final sentence of yours rivals Hemingway for irony, it is perfectly executed and absolutely hilarious. as for the rest, it is pretty good, i’d love to join a kiddush club but i never go to shul. and i’d never suffer a shusher, either.
My shule had a low key Kiddush club until the attendee’s wives started to complain that their husbands were disappearing in middle of the service and not eating any of the food that was served at home
Heshy, people look up to you. Is this what you want to be?:
“One of the biggest obstacles in the search for truth is other people, especially those who make
fun of religion with `sophisticated’ jokes. They are under the spell of philosophical speculation
and other current ideas. The damage they cause is quite obvious. They have the power to corrupt people completely, God forbid. What is even more insidious is the sharp wit of people who give the appearance of being respectable and well meaning, but who have a way of turning all kinds of religious matters into a joke. Many people are deterred from true religion because of this. At least where the blatant mockery of the philosophers is concerned most people have the sense to be wary and keep away, knowing as they do that philosophy has the power to deprive you of both worlds, this one and the next, and to throw you down into the lowest pit of hell, God forbid. But the `wit and wisdom’ of those who give the impression of being decent and religious can be more dangerous because their words possess a certain aura of truth. Travel the path of purity and you will walk in trust. Keep well away from this crowd and pay no attention to their humor and wise ideas. Walk with simplicity and purity along the ancient path of our forefathers (Rabbi
Nachman’s Wisdom 81).”
hesh did you read the book on reb shlomo it is a different judaism. also he could hanle a great joke.what a book.
Hey, I did read it, and went to see SY just cuz of it. It was not the same place as the book. The book paints heaven.
Does anyone know if this blog is experiencing technical difficulties?
so that was my kiddush club!!! my tam tams were broken, sue me!! but that was grade A shwartzes herring man!! i didn’t see you complaining when u were pounding my delicious fish, liking your fingers like you couldn’t get enough of it! my booze was not gheto. wasn’t great but certainly not gheto.
The kiddush club rocked, even if there is no food the conversation is always fun.
Shor yashuv is a regular run of the mill yeshiva with a lot of BT rabbis, ,my old time friends – in their 50s and 60s still go there but its not the same as they have said and Rav Shlomo does talk of another time in his book and yes its a good book.
I said many nice things, and I am never a prick, I am just a satirist – there’s a big difference. You my friend are the one being a prick.
anonymous,
I think you should reconsider what you wrote in the first part of line 1 and speak for yourself!