Yarmulkes are kind of like TV remotes, you lose them once in a while and go freaking crazy. Our TV remote would get lost in the weirdest of places, mostly because, in our family retaining control of the “flicker” meant we wouldn’t have to watch my fathers nature or news programs. Sometimes it wound up in the freezer or on the sink. Yarmulkes are very similar, but losing your yarmulke has much deeper ramifications, for if you lose your yarmulke you will most likely have to switch styles for a day, deeply disturbing some of the regular people you see.
I like black or dark blue suede yarmulkes, mostly because they blend in, don’t make much of a statement (unless you go to very frum shuls) and most importantly they keep my hair from sticking up. I like these yarmulkes to be of the flatter and less rounded kind, mostly because I hate when yarmulkes stick up on your head like in those children’s books.
Luckily I have several backup yarmulkes, these include a very large Hesder Yeshiva style knit, a smaller more modern orthodox high school knit and several of those free flimsy ones they give people who drive to shul on shabbos.
I am also lucky in that my changing of the yarmulke doesn’t garner much attention unless I come in contact with people I haven’t seen in a long time. But, if I were to be a black velvet wearer and switch, it would undoubtedly come into question whether my observance level was still the same.
I have friends that wouldn’t switch for a day if their life depended on it, velvet happens to look good, although I think suede is much neater. I remember when I decided to try out velvet for a short period of time, I could tell the service was better in heimishe establishments and that the shidduch offers were a bit higher class, all because I had lost my yarmulke and switched to velvet while I looked under every seat cushion and random nook in the house, it was like an extreme bedikas chametz.
I have heard from common black velvet wearers who switched to lower class yarmulkes that people will question their observance levels, fearing that they have gone off the derech or are keeping less then before. Its sad to hear, but its quite interesting to see how judgmental people are in real life over the type of yarmulke you wear, if you do switch from black velvet to something else temporary, just be sure to explain your predicament to everyone who starts to question if you are still observant.
Other Yamrulke posts:
Guide to the different yarmulkes
People who don’t wear yarmulkes that often
How yarmulkes came to be invented
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{ 39 comments… read them below or add one }
Its very true I am so particular about the kind that I wear. I have tried the others before but never liked them.
I also dont know anyone that I can think of that wears more than one kind of kippah
there have been papers written about this.
Anon where are they
I love living in a location where no one really knows the difference between kippot styles and are satisfied if you just wear one.
From my experience, there are 4 types of yarmulka wearers:
1) black velvet large – largely chasidim and yeshivish people. has to cover at least 70% of your head, or you are not yotzeh.
2) black velvet small – mostly people from families who wear black velvet large, but are too scared to change to non-black-velvet. Must be flat, sit on top of your head (possibly fastened with bobby pins) and be small enough that it doesn’t encroach on the side or back of your head area.
3) non-black-velvet. either an “out of towner”, come from a family less religous (possibly even holds of the flatbush eiruv), or from a family of black-velvet wearers that got involved with the wrong crowd in high school (girls, drugs, etc).
4) free-yarmulka wearer. you only wear yarmulkas you got from free, either from a basket inside your shul door or from a relative’s bar mitzvah or wedding. the underside of the yalmulka will typically have faded silver wording that lets you know where you got it from. Usually means that either your don’t wear a yarmulka, but keep a few handy in your glove compartment or suitcases for times when you need it. Or you are a poor immigrant that got the yarmulka from the kiruv school you attend.
I don’t run into the problem as I have a wholesale deal with a yarmulka importer. I stock up on a dozen of the same type and size, black velvet size 6, the ones that look like half a DD cup bra.
Phil I must say I never compared yarmulke sizes to bra sizes. Although that makes me think that a yarmulke bra would work for my transgendered friend
you can be orhodox and have a “trans gendered” friend?
Hesh,
That was from the old story about the Jewish peddler that bought a closeout load of black velvet bras. He doubled his money by cutting them in half and selling them as yarmulkas.
Black velvet #6 here, too. Maybe its a Plano BT thing, Phil.
I heard that the kippahs that stick up are for Sephardim. The flat are for Ashkenaz.
AHA! I always call a brassiere a “siamese yalmuke”
…and I thought I was the first.
Texgator,
It’s more like a “baldy” thing for me. I need something that works with gravity as I don’t have much hair to clip anything too.
Velvet was too hot for Plano, I had one of those thinner black material types when I lived there.
I love my huge knitted ones.
One, people don’t know where to judge me, I could be fresh off a settlement in Samaria, or just another super frummy with a suit. People don’t know.
Two, they never get blown off by wind or anything.
Three, I don’t have bad hair days.
Four, fancy designs or alternative colors look just as frum.
Caveat: White points you out as a tourist, BT, BT wannabe, Breslover, or Breslover wannabe (especially if it has na nach on it). Pretty much all other colors are independant of group
I like grey with a modest design in the week, black for shabbos.
Here in Israel Kipput have a political meaning.
I always have a (knit) kippa sruga.
The pattern and size also say something about you
Anonymous 1:09 pm, that is so true.
So I am one, who has made the gradual transition to the one i am wearing now.
I know and agree this is absurd and ridiculous, but yes, at every change it occupied quite a lot o f thought and vindication to implement the new yarmulka.
I am currently wearing a size 3 black velvet 4 “slice” no rim kippa. So my latest “digression” was when i went rimless. You cant imagine the comments, looks and stares i have received since the switch.
Ever since i went to a smaller one, especially since there is no rim, it falls off much easier when its windy. So for some time i was contemplating: yes bobby pin? or no bobby pin? yes bobby pin? or no bobby pin? after walking around a few months with my hand on my head every time it was a bit windy, i decided screw this, and bought balck ones. i got so much helL:: “bum” “upgefuren” “groelig” ” s’past nist” ” at least when you come into shul take it off”
Hey that’s the crazy world of BP and Willi.
what would you know about tv and their remote? i thought you grew up without one…
Critic are you serious about the rimless people are that shallow?
Phil,
When I shave my head, I roll up some duct tape under my srugi.
when i started wearing a yarmulka daily, i put on a black velvet size 4 because it fit my head the best. now, it’s all black velvet 4-6 or i just don’t feel right.
Like I’ve stated numerous times- what you wear, is how you will act!!!!!!!!! The same thing holds true with which yarmulka you wear. Different yarmulkas will effect your behavior. Ayeshiva guy who wears a kippa sruga will undoubtedly act more modern and associate with more modern folks. Think about it and when you have something intelligent to say…….
Yochanan,
Assuming you’re religious, where the hell does your peyos go when you shave your head? In the trash can? Perhaps you leave only the peyos and look chassidish? I’d like to hear what your response will be:)
mba 2:12, that’s hilarious. and not true.
yeshiva dude – us cool cats have these awesome things called side-burns.
Sheesh, given the Orthodox world’s obsession with every tiny detail of one’s clothing (and everything else), it’s a wonder that anyone ever becomes a BT.
For your amusement, here’s my illustrated levush guide.
I love those Na Nach Nachman Meuman yarmulkas.For some reason when I wear it arround srtangers they give me the “look”.Well maybe Im a serious bressluver chasid.Not everyone whot wears that yarmulka is an ex-druggie who found g-d at a shlomo carlebach shindig
I’d have to agree with the dude who commented about the orthodox’s obsessions with every tiny detail. God’s world is too fun to only be black and white. I just love wearing my kippah sruga (which happens to be about a 6 and is multi-colored) in places where people will look at me for not wearing a black one. Is there really a difference between a Yid who’s shomer mitzvos and had a sruga and a Yid who’s shomer mitzvos with a black. (By the way, most yeshiva wanna-be’s just put on a black, but have no idea of why they are doing so or even have any valid non-emotional reason for remaining Jewish)
gumby!
I come into contact with people who see chumrot, think that they are dealing with normative halacha, and think “Halacha is nuts”.
Which is a disservice to halacha.
“I’d have to agree with the dude who commented about the orthodox’s obsessions with every tiny detail. ” Thanks for the compliment, but Shira is a woman’s name, last I heard. Or am I just too old to know that “dude” is now being applied to both genders?
Rentsy, I second that. Whatever happened to normal Orthodox Judaism, you know, the kind for which the only requirement is being shomer mitzvot and no one cares whether you dress like a penguin or like a normal human being but on the modest side?
Hmm, I think I can probably top everyone here in terms of comments and stares due to yarmulke style…you see, I rotate between five yarmulkes that my mother crocheted for me. They vary in size, color, and pattern, but they all have my name on- two in English, three in Hebrew.
This probably wouldn’t be a big deal if I were a boy. Or if I didn’t currently live in Israel, land-of-the-judgmental-strangers.
Thanks for bringing light to this issue. I had no idea. My son has been sporting a navy blue velvet kippah all of his life. What if he wants to switch when he is a bar mitzvah? Should he start wearing black velvet?
Michal,
I live in the Sephardic section of town and I have noticed they do tend to wear the black velvet kippahs. The younger ones will wear them on the tops of their heads towards the front causing a dome effect and making it look like they’re about to fall off.
Shira
if the word ‘dude’ is t untzinus for you, I can use ‘dudette’?? that would also depend on your age, to determine whether you’re too old to use ‘dude’ for both genders?…by the way, I’m well versed in male and female Jewish and Goyish names, and I know Shira is a girl’s [thanks for clarifying;)]
that should say too, instead of just a t
I used to have this big red velvet one I was very proud of. One day, I was walking through Boro Park, and this dude pulled over his bike to tell me (in his broken English) that I shouldn’t wear that yarmulke because it’s the kind that Cardinals wear (or, if I remember correctly, he was telling me that I look like the Pope, only he used the Yiddish term, I forget what it is at the moment). He even took off his hat, pulled off his velvet yarmulke, and told me to wear it instead. I politely refused.
Then there was the big knitted one with the colors of the Jamaican flag that I bought in a Venice Beach headshop. There was a period when I’d wear that one a lot. One day, I was sitting in Ali Baba’s on the UWS wearing it. A man walked into the restaurant just to ask me what shul I daven in. I answered “whatever shul I happen to be in.” Unpressed, he asked “well what shul lets you in with that thing on your head?” I said “well, if they’re going to throw me out just because of this yarmulke, I wouldn’t daven with them anyways.”
And oh, anyone ever seen the one that’s half velvet/half sruggi, that says “Ani Oheiv Kol Yehudim” on it?
ghottistyx,
I’d love to have a rasta kippa what as I make reggae records and DJ roots & steppers (only on Saturday night events of course).
Actually I dont own one at all. I’m still a few months away from formal conversion and theres no place to buy one in Tokyo anyway. When I grab from the basket at shul I always go for a small green velvet one just smaller than the size of a saucer for a coffee cup.
Hi,
Whats the significance between the colours of the Kippah. Is there a reason someone might choose to wear a white one over a black one.
Thanks