In about 2 weeks I will be having my first Shidduch Shabbos, a shidduch shabbos is when a girl or guy comes to your city for the whole weekend because they live too far away otherwise. Usually it is the guy who goes there, though within the shidduch crisis some women have begun to think out of the box and judging from all the scientific data coming out about why so many girls are unmarried at the age of 19, some have begunto do reverse chivalry and visit the guys hometown in hopes that they will meet their match or at least get to eat some kosher Chinese food while they piss and moan about how the guy sounded so much different on the phone.
Unlike regular old shidduch dating which takes place over the span of 3 hours or so. Shidduch shabbos or weekends whichever you prefer, take place over the span of the weekend usually including two or three dates no matter how each party feels about each other. It can be successful or it could be hell depending on your attitude, I feel success already because I do in fact see lots of potential with the person who is flying over a thousand miles to meet me, because if I didn’t I wouldn’t want her to waste a perfectly good ticket which could be used for Montana or something to come to winter in New York City.
Of course the biggest fear of which shidduch weekend participants have is attraction. This is my biggest fear, what if I am not attracted to this person, luckily she is way cooler then most so I would still have a ball hanging out with her anyway. But what if you are not attracted? Should I tell her to go hang out with her friends rather then waste another date? Though having fun and with me I can assure fun, isn’t wasted. Maybe this person should go on some other quickly arranged dates to make her single shidduch weekend into a marathon- my buddy goes on marathons- while I don’t necessarily agree with this practice it involves going on up to 5 shidduchim in one day, since many folks who do this live thousands of miles away from the closest legal female they are somewhat justified, or are they not?
According to two friends of mine who participated in this age old practice of the shidduch weekend- it is unethical to drop the girl after the first date. In fact unlike other dating practices you must stick with the girl regardless of how much you dislike her, it matters not if you throw up in your mouth every time you gaze at her, or whether you want to strangle her every time she says OMG or LOL in that valley girl voice, you must stick to the plan.
This may sound crazy of me but I am actually pumped, the girl is super cool and I am looking forward to it. With that said, this feeling only comes after a bunch of successful fluid phone conversations, it also comes with the realization that no matter what this person looks like I will still love spending time with her, regardless of whether we meet again.
To make matters even more interesting- this person who is using traveling across time zones to get here was someone who initiated contact with me by emailing me about 3 months ago on you tube after watching some of my videos. I was intrigued, intrigued enough that after I ended my last relationship I dug up her message from my pile of you tube emails and contacted her. Pretty cool eh…