And so the debate begins in your bed late at night, trying to gauge whether it is worth it to don your clothing to go and use the bathroom. You are cozy, snuggled up under the covers in just your underwear, and it would be just downright ugly if you finished your business and opened the door to find your friends mom looking at you in just your underwear with your belly flopped out and thinking to her self “maybe I shouldn’t have said, make yourself at home.”
As silly and trivial as this scene may seem, it actually takes up a big portion of debating where to spend shabbos, obviously there is more to it, but late night bathroom trips to the bathroom without clothing are quite important to me. You see in my house we never wore anything but underwear and I grew up thinking that pajamas were for the rich folks from normal families on shows like Full House and Family Matters.
Then I was thrust into the real world and realized that you cannot just walk around in your underwear, it just isn’t right, but late night bathroom trips are different. Especially when you don’t have naything but your suit pants and shabbos shirt to put on, things can get a little hairy. Multiple calculations can take place as soon as nature calls. First of all where is the location of the bathroom? Is it right around the corner, or down the hall? Which rooms contain their own bathrooms? What was served for dinner, did it include things like alcohol and coffee, which would make the chances of seeing another bladder releasing person on the way to or from the bathroom?
The best situation is when the bathroom is connected to your room, but in most real situations it is not, usually I always get the guest room, which means the room set aside as the married couples room, with a crib and two separate beds in case of nida. For some reason these rooms are always farthest from the bathroom, maybe to create a sense of privacy for couples willing to break the code of ethics and have sex in a friends house (is there some sort of code of ethics anyway?)
Put it this way I base half of the reason I stay at one friends house over the other based on the underwear effect as I have so brilliantly called it. Luckily I have not been caught with my pants down, and usually just throw on a t-shirt and pretend that my underwear are shorts by hanging them down a little, which may be worse if a gust of wind came and lifted my shirt up like Marlyn Monroe on a subway grate- issues I tend not to think of when my pee needs to be shot out of me.
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{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
Hey man – why not invest in a bathrobe?
or buying a pair of sweatpants?
B”H I think the sweat pants idea is a good one. Just how much space could they take up in a bag? I don’t like carrying any bag at all if I don’t have to, but I think this is worth it. Just grab an old plastic bag, if you have to. Or where thermals under your pants, then change out of them when you get to here you’re going, if they’re too hot. Use them as your PJ’s later, making sure they’re not too tight in the crouch. Cuz it wouldn’t be very tzni’us if they were.
Oh great, you got spammed also by this stupid Leah Kleim bullshit?
Da Wife took the liberty of deleted this absolutely disgusting comment from my blog, even before I read it.
Like who gives a flying fuck about Leah Kleim?
Such bullshit!
haha those chasidim with long boxers never have a problem!
yeah i agree with investin in a bathrobe,- done so myself…works out nicely
coz u know, bathrobes provide easy access ;p
How about just wearing an undershirt and flannel sleep pants/shorts to bed as pajamas? You would probably already pack the undershirt seeing it’s shabbos and the bed shorts or pants can’t take up that much room. I think a robe is a silly idea because it doesn’t pack well, and who wears robes anymore other than my grandfather?
Ps what about girls who have thsi issue, well not sleeping in their underwear but those who would rather wear sweat pants to bed? Do you slip your skirt on over the pants or do you sleep in a nightgown that is tznius?
HESH-U ONCE AGAIN SHOW UR READERS WHAT KIND OF FREAK ARE…DO U EVER HAVE THE “PANTS DEBATE”….s/t like”yawnnnn its morning….should I put pants on today? naaahhh, I will just let my undies hang low. noone will notice…”U FREAK
i did not say that last comment i dunno why it has my name.
Then again, a bathrobe might cause your hosts to think that you are going to shower, and thus be Mechalel Shabbat.
Hesh, delete that stupid Leah Kleim comment above.
Not that this has anything to do with pyjamas, but this reminded me of the time I stayed at my friends house and his grandmother was over for the weekend, and I went to the bathroom after the meal and she was sitting on the can!
Turns out she never locks the door because shes worried she’ll fall or something and be trapped in there.
I wish that on noone.
im a girl and i just pull on a skirt over whatever im wearing if i hafta run out to use the restroom. id feel so bad if i ran into my friend’s husband…
nuch, loosen up. i thought it was funny.
Jeez look what happens when you work an 11 hours day, tons of great comments and yes I deleted that stupid shit.
Ok I grew up in a an underwear house, so wearing anything besides that to bed is like sleeping with clothes on.
Someone up above really took this post a little too serious, wow.
Hesh, you drive around in your car carrying 2 bikes , a kayak, cross country skis, 1300 cds, but you cant find room for a stupid pair of gym shorts??? If I ever see you at my place in the middle of the night scrambling for the toilet in your undies, my foot will connect with your sack.
There is no “code of ethics”. You should assume that most married people are doing it if you have them over for Shabbos.
Shabbos Guest:
what does that have to do with what I wrote about?
“For some reason these rooms are always farthest from the bathroom, maybe to create a sense of privacy for couples willing to break the code of ethics and have sex in a friends house (is there some sort of code of ethics anyway?) “
according to the kitzur, married couples can do it if they bring their own sheets
dude, i’m an underwear guy too! i bring as little as little as possible; my ideal is nothing but a contact lense case and a flask. and yo, in my house, it’s really ok. except if you’re a guest amd you’re having sex, you’re getting videotaped. (and it’s going on the internet) but for real, you can’t find room in the back of the Ru for a pair of goddamn shorts?!
hesh, hit me bout the youTube shtick.
Mordy- took me a little while to realize who you were. Yeh I am going to post that after I get back from DC
just get a pair of shorts or a bathing suit that could pass as shorts… simple enough. then you just need to remember to bring them!
Dude it was not meant to be so serious, its just that late at night when you really ave to pee, you dont want to be fumbling around for a pair of shorts that will be needed for a 10 foot walk.