I have written about frumster and all its glory many times and will continue to do so. In the past few weeks I have been inundated with weird experiences all having to do with frumster. By the way, it is quite rare that someone actually sends me a message, and in the past few weeks I have gotten messaged by 4 different people, who’s profiles I hadn’t even looked at.
The first girl, or lady shall we say, was a 48 year old women with kids who felt the need to tell me not to give up and that it was tough for her outdoorsy self to find someone as well. The initial message, which should have been the end of the conversation sounded as if it were a 14 year old girl talking on instant messenger. All the sudden I received another message- on frumster- it can be agreed when a conversation is over- well this women felt that she should take more information so she could “set” me up with someone.
That wasn’t so weird, but then it got weird, I received another message that was completely incoherent, and the women or man I have no clue was trying to make small talk. To this message I did not respond. Then I received a message from the same women who had changed her profile name, and put that she was located in the same town I was located in, interesting because prior to that she was from NY metro area.
That didn’t freak me out at all, I thought it was kind of cool to be stalked by some Russian looking 48 year old women with a blond sheitle who wrote like a 15 year old teeny bopper. Then it got weirder, she sent me another message from the same profile and changed her name again. When I tried to retrieve these messages to bring them to you it turns out her profile is gone and with that the messages as well.
The next girl was a 28 year old fashion person from New York City, not too interesting of a profile, and her initial message went as follows- “so…u into older girls.” I could have swore she sounded like a 12 year old trying to get a date with a 10 year old, but 28, jeez!
So I wrote back that, yes, I do date older girls and asked her if she could write me an email explaining why she was interested in me, since her profile was one of the types that I automatically reject, based on its normalcy. Here is her second message, in response to my short letter asking her what she is into:
“ha ha…thats pathetic that a 48 year old woman is stalking u thats like our parents age…..maybe your like the son she never had…eeeww that’s gross if you think about it…
you hook it up….where were u for second days succhot……i was in uws wow crazy and intense..but less people then other years…..”
Instead of rejecting her like a man, I felt that wasting a few sentences on her would be a moot point, so I did the basic frumster reject letter and here was her response- there should be no response by the way. The whole point of the reject letter is to get you the hell away from my profile. “ok ur weird..bye.” You see I have never heard of women lying about their age to be older, but maybe this 14 year old wants to be double her age, who knows?
The third girl of the past couple weeks is not too weird, but I wonder if people realize that they come across like idiots when they write like this. Now I never said I could spell or use grammar correctly, but this is pathetic, at least she was 20, so I couldn’t hold so much against her.
“so u like to wonder around forgotten towns? hmm.. that seems like alot of fun actually.. which is ur fav. place that uve seen so far? ok ok im random i kno.. anyway i had to break the ice somehow.. u seem like a chilled out guy 
lol feel free to write back if ud like .. hope u have a great day.. o and my password is red315 for my pic (in case u were wondering)
~Me”
If you are wondering what I write to initiate conversation with folks on frumster, here it is. Almost everyone gets the same message, “Hi I liked your profile, take a look at mine and tell me what you think.” I do it short and sweet because I can write a long rant, only to have the person read it and never respond, or just send me a rejection, so why waste words.
Have any whacked out frumster rants or stories, I would love to hear them.
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{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow this is interesting. they sound like ppl in my grade- thats sooo how they would talk (and me too i guess) but ur standard message seems more like the right way to go. frumster is funny.
wow your such a jew bastard
so jewy and shit
bitches yall mek me sick ,
stop being all amerikan and shit……your a Jew !@
What!!!
At least people are talking to you….for the short time I had frumster only one person talked to me and it was because I initiated the it.
Jon,
Are you referring to richard or the stalker?
Ah, the frumster post…
Older women rock! I would know, I married one. No, not some 48(!) old russian blondie tho..
Perhaps these chicks that are writing think that they can get away with writing as if you are on Instant Messenger with them.
I have noticed that the people who write like that tend to be in the same lines of work. Fashion, comes to mind as well as, babysitting, hair styling and any other profession that does not let you write.
They also tend to be folks who may not be taking the whole frumster thing seriously- which they should- and if they aren’t taking it seriously how the hell do they expect to get married.
Re Frumster: I have an interesting situation I’d like to talk to you about privately. There’s something very starnge going on there…. and potentially libelous, and thus the reason for privacy first. Can you give me an email address?
frumsatire@gmail.com
Ive noticed that everywhere. Most people use chat speak, even though itmakes them seem very immature. I try to limit my usage to just ‘lol’ or ‘btw’. It’s just sickening, but I guess that’s because I love writing and I enjoy proper spelling and attempting to use proper grammar, too (Attempting being the key word there :p)
I suggest ignoring the ones who type like that. If they were thinking about making a good impression they wouldn’t resort to chat speak. It’s like handing in a resume – You would want to write it properly with no spelling or grammar mistakes in order to make the best possible impression.
And yes, older people on sites like that – Really strange and creepy.
When is Richard Smith’s next live poetry reading?
I think the laziness in trying to communicate with a potential marriage partner is uncalled for, its not like I am trying to get some ass(well maybe) but the tachlis is marriage and in that case it should be taken seriously.
Hi I just saw your blog–love it! I totally agree with this post (and a lot of them) but had to comment on this one. I HATE that on these dating sites people have such bad punctuation and grammar, especially because most computers now have automatic spell check!!!! It is such a pet peeve of mine! I think its so unprofessional. I know that this isn’t a professional thing-its dating-but even more so don’t people want to give off a good impression??? I’m glad to hear that other people also have similar frustrations and that its not just me LOL. I also understand that people have different educational backgrounds or that they may have a learning disability or something and I feel bad that I am annoyed by this but it still am…
With regard to older people/weird/random people stalking you on online dating sites, I think thats par for the course on all of the sites-my friends and I have all gotten the same weird older guys on Frumster and SYAS (Saw You At Sinai) and I’m fairly certain that they’re not for any of us (if I remember correctly one in particular was like in his early 40’s–we’re in our early 20’s–lives in NY–we live “out of town”–and was possibly also divorced). Ahh the wonders of dating.
Anyways, keep posting and I’ll keep reading!
I think there should definitely be some sort of feature to allow you to block older folks from messaging you, kid of like a warning that says- HEY i AM OLD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR GRANDSON!!!
I also hate the fact that whenever you look at someones profile they get to see the last time you looked at it. People think you are hitting on them by looking at it more then once, when in reality you could just be showing it to your friends or making fun of how stupid their profile is.
LOL!! OMG!!
ha ha, I could not resist.
I remember you mentioning you have a stalker, little did I know all the gory details.
Cute story. “cute”
Keep it up
Well, I suppose that you should be somewhat flattered. Emphasis on the “somewhat”.
At least it makes for a good blog post?
Well I think the women was a reader of the blog and knew it would be made into a blog post. Amazing as that sounds I have actually had that happen.
A guy posted an ad on criagslist and after I posted it on my blog he contacted me and said that he wrote it just for me. I also hd a facebook/frumster stalker who stalked me on both sites and demanded a post be written about her.
The life of an e-celebrity, eh?
Girls in their early 20s get hit on by older (by which I mean over 50) guys on frumster all the time. I actually know of one story where this had a happy ending and they are married with a baby now so good for them.
This is the funniest frumster message I ever got from an old guy: “I am an older man but I still have a dream…my dream is to have children ….before I slip from this mortal coil….and that those children will be jewish ..”
Hey that is a great message- I am glad you found this post its classic. I have gotten stalked on frumster a lot- usually by really weird people.
I know this old guy that only messages girls under 30- he is 60 and lives with his mom and never changes his clothing. He said “whats the point of getting married if the women I marry cant have kids” so he goes after the youngens.
yeah, but who wants to have kids with someone who might not be around to see the children reach the age of mitzvah? (of course, anyone could die, any day, but to the extent to which one has the option of planning a life with someone, older-than-abba isn’t usually an age category I look into. But I’m picky like that. [/s]
classic. and excellent.
i also had a guy about 13 years my senior stalking me for quite some time. it isnt terribly rare in this silly blog-topia.
No man under 45 wants to come near a woman in her 30’s with a child. Period. Like you have a bubonic plague….Man over 50 and well into 70’s are like flies over honey. Althouhg the profile states I want to have more children. By the way, I got this response from a 40ish never married w/o kids man. You are extremely attractive and good luck (yes, good luck! finding a husband!). And here is another one from a guy who doesn’t want for anybody to hold it against him that he has a child. He did not even reply to the message where wrote back his own sentence “don’t hold against me that I have a child”.
I am very disappointed. I has been one week I submitted my profile but I want to take it down. Why we Jews are so predjudiced against single mothers? I feel like I am back in the old country….
You do understand that I was 25 years old at the time right